


Drag Me Down

by SoSecret



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alpha Harry, Alpha Liam, Alpha Zayn, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Anxiety, Brainwashing, Eating Disorder, Eventual Smut, Kidnapping, Louis-centric, M/M, Multi, Nightmares, OT5-Relationship - Freeform, Omega Louis, Omega Niall, Panic Attacks, Secrets, Self-Hatred, Touring, omegaspace, subdrops, “Beta” louis
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-25
Updated: 2017-12-04
Packaged: 2018-12-06 19:55:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 17
Words: 37,033
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11607837
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SoSecret/pseuds/SoSecret
Summary: Louis is being a secret omega and his father uses him to earn money. He brought his son to scientists who illegally experiment with omegas. Louis bandmates and the world don’t know anything about the harm Louis has to suffer from. What will happen to Louis if they find out?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys,  
> English is not my first language so please bare with me.  
> I want to apologise beforehand for any mistakes you might find.  
> Nevertheless, I hope you will enjoy this story!  
> The descriptions of Harry, Niall, Liam and Zayn are not exaclty my own words.  
> Louis did say some of the stuff I have written, it is of one of his interviews.  
> Maybe you will know what I mean when you read it.

It’s the last concert before the two week long break until they move on to the American leg of the OTRA Tour. Louis is standing in the back, watching his pack sing and goof around whilst “best song ever”. This is the one place everything is good and he doesn’t have to think about the lie his life is. Around his pack he can nearly be himself. He feels the adrenaline and pure happiness he experiences on stage with his fans and his four favorite people on the planet. He forgets the world outside the stadium and just lets the music let him flow. This is his stage. He has full control and does not have to fake his smile or his laugh. However, the song is almost finished and Louis puts his whole heart in the last few lines. They say their goodbye to the fans and leave the stage. 

“You were amazing, darling!” The three alphas of the pack engulf Niall in a bone crashing hug and kiss the last bit of breath out of him. He will always be showered with compliments after a show. It started back in the early days of one direction when Niall finally presented and Harry, Zayn and Liam took it as their duty to make the omega feel loved and encourage him.

Louis goes to the restroom. No one really cares about him after a show. He did nothing incredible good. His voice is weak. 

During their brake he will go home to his “dad”. The other people around him think he is very close with his family and loves them. That is a lie. But that is just a small one. His biggest lie is that he is an omega.

He presented at 15 with only his dad home. They never really talked about presenting or what would happen if Louis was omega. He always thought his parents would be fine with him being either way alpha, beta or omega. Well, now he knows better. His dad smelled him and came to his room. He did not yell at him. No, he was calm. But what was worse than yelling was to see the disappointed face of his dad. Louis had tears in his eyes when his dad explained what would happen to him. His life would dramatically change. He would go on suppressants and no one except his father knew anything. His mom was on a business trip and his sisters at a friend´s house.

_Would it be different when my mom was there when I presented? Would she have protected me or has she the same opinion as "dad" does?_

But that doesn’t matter. There is no need to think how good his life could have been. He knows he should live in the world of today even when it's hard sometimes. It was years ago when his dad told him he would be a shame for the family if anyone knew. He should make his mom proud of him and by being a beta he would do that. Louis likes the idea of pleasing people. Maybe that are his instincts but be doesn’t care. What counts is the smile on the face of his mom when he told her he was beta. Everything he has gone through made it worth it. His mom is proud of him. His mom is proud of him. His mom is Proud. Of him. And maybe, just maybe, his dad will be too if he does what he wants. That is what he always thinks about when he is laying on the examination table where his dad took him to be part of the experiences they did years ago to omegas. 

Now, alone in the room, he can let his thoughts wander. Nobody will see his closed up facial expression. Nobody will see how his hands begin to slightly shake. Nobody will smell his anxiety while he thinks about what will happen when he goes “home”. His father will most likely take him to Dr. Morris, the leader of the studies on omegas.  
His father and Dr. Morris were good friends since they were little kids. 30 years prior omegas where viewed as the minor species. They had to wear their color and were leashed when they went outside. Sometimes they were even naked as a punishment, other times out of pure enjoyment of their alphas seeing them be uncomfortable. They weren’t allowed to speak without spoken to and had no rights. They were sluts. Worthless. And that's what Louis is too. 

But now, things are different. People realized omegas where precious and reserved the same rights like betas and alphas. Even more. An omega cannot be discriminated against or humiliated just because of their second gender. They can choose their job, food, home and more all by themselves. It was common to use omegas for experiences what is in these days highly illegal. Even though, Louis was such an object for the scientist. But they are doing it for good! They want to help everyone. He endures pain to help. His sacrifice is little. He hates it but will do it if that what could make lives of others better. 

He hears the boy’s laughter from outside the door and snaps out of his thoughts. They don’t know anything about what he has gone through. And they will probably never know. Not that he would tell them. How could you tell your best friends you go through such horrible things? They would argue him out of it and then he would not be longer available for experiences. That would not help! Dr. Morris needs him to create new products that are beneficial. 

Leaving the loo and going to the dressing room he tries to clear his head, taking deap breaths and putting on a smile. They should not smell his anxiety and stress. They would be curious and feel him out. Lying to the alphas is hard. He has to suppress his instincts of bowing his head, whimpering and telling them the truth. He learned a long time ago that it is easier for him if he is loud and funny. Make some jokes and rule the conversation by deciding what they should talk about. 

“Hey, Louis, what´cha worrying about? You look like a deer caught in the headlights. Come on, now we have a break and can chill! You will see your family again. That’s something to be happy about” Nobody can fool Niall. He always tells if something is not right and tries to make it better. Omegas feel the urge to please others and in Niall´s opinion he does that by making the people around him smile and happy. 

“Nothing´s up, Niall. I´m just a little sad I won’t see your pretty face for almost two weeks.” Louis says with a smile and makes him giggle. Niall is the most endearing person he has ever met. He is the perfect omega. Louis wishes he could be like him. The little sunshine, always full of joy and a good hug. He’s the most lovely guy in the world. Happy-go-lucky Irish, no sense of arrogance. And he’s fearless. 

And he wishes he would have such fantastic alphas. Zayn, back in the day. He could relate to him on a nerves level. In the first year they were both the least confident. But Zayn has a fantastic voice and for him it was always about owning that. He is good looking and has his own way of doing thinks. He is down to earth and sometimes he might seem shy but he is a good laugh when you know him better. Liam always had a good stage presence, same as Harry, they’ve both got that ownership. Harry comes across very cool and charming. He has a heart of gold and is great to fool around with. Liam’s all about getting the crowd going, doing a bit of dancing. Behind the scenes he is responsible and the leader of the pack and keeps a cool head when needed. 

_And then there is me_ , Louis thinks. _The boy at the back._

They are all a pack but Louis is not sexual involved in anything. The most he gets is a peck on the cheek. Harry, Liam and Zany make sure everyone knows Niall is theirs and just belongs to them. They love Louis, like a brother. At least Louis thinks that. They will never open up about their true feelings for him. He is a beta. They are alphas. A relationship between them would not go well. And to a certain extent they think he might be jealous of Niall if he gets more attention than Louis in a realtionship. Maybe he would feel left out but on the other hand they know Louis; he loves his freedom and is not really affectionate. Louis comes to them if he really needs something. It was that way from the start and they accepted that. You can't force a beta to do something he doesn’t want. Sure, you could try but that would just lead to an argument. Sometimes, they want to punish him so bad for what he has done. But they weren’t allowed. The pack would ignore Louis till they think he had enough. Betas are okay with being ignored but only to an extent. And the alphas have the need to take care of people especially if they are pack. Although, they know they should not make it too obviously because Louis doesn’t like that. He has his pride and always claims he can perfectly take care of him himself. 

“Cheeky” Harry who heard the comment laughs, lifts Niall up the couch he sits on, puts him in his lap and nuzzles his nose in the crook of his neck taking the scent of his omega in. “We will miss you too, Lou. Call if anything’s up. But I can’t promise we will answer. We might be too caught up.” With that he kisses and licks Niall´s neck who doesn’t care Louis is right beside them and moans shamelessly. 

Louis tries really hard to hold his jealousy back. He can’t stand the other four boys being all cuddly and affectionate with each other. It just shows him what he will never have. He loves the boys and not just in the brotherly way. But he can obviously not tell them that. 

“Right…” Louis coughs uncomfortably as the scent of arousal thickens the air around them. “I will just change and then drive to the airport. “ 

The goodbye to his pack is quick but lovely. 

“Come here, Tommo. Take care and call sometime. I will pick you up from the airport when you come back to London. Just message me. And don’t party too much I don’t …” It would have gone on like that but Louis hugs him tightly and discreetly tries to scent Liam. But Liam feels him doing it and gives him an assuring smile when they break free from the hug. 

“You need a shower, payno, you stink” is all Louis says and ignores the knowing glance of Liam. 

It is similar with the other boys. He needs to memorize their scents even if he already knows them by heart. Liam smells like the air after it rains and the grass after mowing it. It is fresh and new and washes away all the bad things. Harry smells of a garden. All different scents of flowers like roses, magnolias, tulips and lily of the valley. He himself is a lovely flower which reminds Louis of the onetime where he gave him a white rose. Zayn smells like all different kind of woods and the cigarettes he smokes. When Louis smells him he always think of the nights where they would sit together and smoke and just enjoy each other’s companies. Niall smells like a bakery, sweet, sugary with different kind of fruits. Sometimes like apples and other days more like strawberries. He tempts Louis to just to eat Niall instead of his actual food. And Louis … he just smells like his shampoo and nothing special. His suppressants and the spray to hide his scent do their best. Ore the worst … who knows? It is common knowledge suppressants are bad and have a lot of side effects. But Louis is willing to take the risk. 

****

Louis looks up at the board where the arrivals and departures of the planes are visibly. Shit! His plane is cancelled. He recognizes the upcoming panic attack and tries to take deep breathes. After a few minutes he pulls out his phone. The screen stays black. _Shit! Shit! Shit!_ Louis pulls at his hair and looks frantically around. What should he do now? His father is waiting for him and he has to be home in a few hours. He doesn’t even want to think of the punishment he will get if he is late. 

He runs to the information desk and asks the woman behind it if there is a different plane which flies to Doncaster. Thank god, there is! 

On the plane he tries to sleep. To shut out his thoughts. His quivering hands. His short breathes. His too fast thumping heart. 

But he just can't. He charges his smartohone and checks for any important messages. There are no. Of course. 

He thought about calling the lads. But they will probably have sex and that won’t help the situation at all. 

He just puts his earphones in and listens really loudly to “Green Day”. 

The plane lands at 10 in the evening. 

The car ride is silent. He sweats like shit and tries to think about his pack. Flood his mind with happy memories. Their x factor performances. The late movie nights. The jokes they always pull and pranks they do. The cigarettes with Zayn on the gas stations. The water fights with Liam. The tea drinking with Harry before they go to bed. All the times Niall wants to go to Nandos. Just the five of them on the tour bus talking about nonsense. A little smile creeps on his lips but before it transforms into a big grin the car stops in front of the house everything began in. 

_Now everything will go downhill._


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis is in the laboratory.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING: this chapter consists mostly of abuse, Rape/Non-Con and omega drop 
> 
> The chapter is a little longer but I am sure you won't mind ;)  
> Thanks for reading,  
> your SoSecret xx

Louis is nine days at home. That are nine days too many. Well, actually he isn’t really nine days in the house where he grew up. No, he is just the night after his arrival in his room, alone, without seeing his sisters. His younger ones are already asleep and Lottie and Féli are in Uni. His mother is on one of her business trips again, but she knows that Louis and her husband are going to have a lovely time while they do their own little vacation. She is almost every time working when Louis is home. It was that way since he was little. She is a very good mom and he loves her dearly but he also misses her with his whole heart. Louis wishes she would be there when he needs a hug or a good night kiss. It might sound stupid because he is 24 but his mom is the only person he isn’t afraid of to show really affection towards. Every time he feels down between interviews, photoshoots, rehearsing and performing he would call her and just listen to what she said. There is no way he can tell her how miserable he really is, but saying there is a lot of stress and he is tired is enough and she believes him. 

This “vacation” with his dad always happens when Louis is home. His friends and family think he and his dad are going hiking, fishing or swimming. Mostly four to five days. In fact, that is partly true. His father goes hiking, fishing or swimming. But Louis is in a laboratory. Sometimes experiencing heat and being raped. Other times in a dark room or different situations which are all horrible. He does not look forward to the next morning. When he came through the front door his dad didn’t look up from the television, just said that he hast to be ready at 8 am the next day. Louis didn’t expect anything else of his father. That was almost the only sentence he got from him for nine years, since he presented. Other conversations included cleaning the house or doing other stuff his dad was just too lazy for. Louis had to go to school and keep his grades up whilst being the “maid” and taking care of his sisters. All the time being on suppressants and pretending he is tough. He put up a few fights with alphas over his school years. Nothing too bad but he lost every single fight. His body wasn’t made for things like punching. He has no real muscles and no know-how. He was made to submit and not dominate. 

The night before the laboratory is one of the worst, Louis dreads to have nightmares about past experiences. But being awake is not better. He just keeps thinking about what will happen, what they will do to him. When it is too much he just takes a few sleeping pills. Louis is not stupid. He knows he needs to sleep. He won’t get enough of it the next few days. As well as food. The few days before he ate much more than normally. He needs the fat because he knows he won’t have time to really eat once he steps a foot in the heat room. Most of the time, the first thing he will do is having a heat. Dr. Morris sends him an E-Mail a few days prior and instructed Louis to not take his suppressants. Within 30 hours his heat will arrive. The first five days he will be preoccupied being raped or coping with the burn in his body himself. He doesn’t really know what is worse. Rape is always humiliating, showing off how weak and pathetic he is and it hurts. They don’t prep him. They just use him like the slut he is. Sometimes his mind is too out and he doesn’t feel the pain they cause him or his slick is enough of lubrication. And his body betrays him. Before and after the rape he doesn’t want it! But in his heat his mind is fine with everything that happens to him if it releases the burning feeling and the want for a knot. But he also pleases the alpha. It cannot be so bad if he pleases someone. He makes them feel good. Why does he even care about himself if he helps the alpha? He exists to please them and take care of them. That is his purpose! 

With those thoughts he drifts of in a restless slumber. 

****

His dad drove him one hour to the laboratory in the woods. All the assistants and doctors have actual professions and they all take time off their work to experiment with Louis. That should make him feel honored. They are coming there partly for Louis. He doesn’t want to waste their time so he gives his best. 

He remembers the first time he met Dr. Morris. They had a quick chat. The doctor explained that he cannot tell anyone about what happens in the laboratory and that he is an omega. If he wants to be good he has to pretend to be beta. That is very important and Louis does not want to make the doctor mad and disappoint him. Furthermore, he helps other people by going through the stuff they will test on him. He will be a good boy if he permits them to use him. And he will be a bad boy if he tells someone about anything. Louis omega preened at the words “good boy”. He wants so badly to be good. His father never said anything like that to him. And all the other people don’t say “good boy” to a beta. That would be a little bit weird. These scientists can’t be bad if they tell him he is a good boy. At that time he eagerly nodded. He will do everything if they call him good boy. And they know that. 

Louis got into the room he always attends on his heats. On the floor is a mattress and one wall has a one-way mirror. Through that wall the scientist are watching. Watching how he gets raped. Watching how he endures pain until he is unconscious. The mirror is one of the most things he hates. He has to look at himself. At his ugly figure and the fat on his tummy. Louis subconsciously sees how he begs to be filled up and how he can’t get enough. He is such a slut. And the mirror drives every alpha crazy. They pull at his hair so he has to look in the mirror. They whisper gross things into his ear. What a cunt he is. They make him scream alpha and he sees himself get off, reaching his high and knows he can’t do anything about it. He doesn’t want this but the smell of alpha around him; the touches of the big hands on him and his heat fool his body. Louis is helpless. 

Dr. Morris steps in the room. In his hand a syringe. That’s new to Louis. He never gets an injection before heat. What for? There is no reason for that. His birth control injection is set every 6 month. Louis got it a few months ago. He should be fine. He slightly backs away. Injections are a bad sign. He learned that over the time. Dr. Morris smiles and tells him he has no reason to be afraid. If he complains they have to tie him down like every other time he gets too panicked. That just intensifies his worries but he knew he had to cooperate. There is no need anyway. He had no chance running away. After the reminder of the doctor that it is for the good and he does want to be a good boy he stretches out his arm. In his mind he repeats the words Dr. Morris just said to him. 

_He is a good boy. He is a good boy and he does it for good._

When the doctor was done he left the room and a bully alpha entered. Louis whimpered.  
_So, this is one of the times I will be raped._

The alpha didn’t wait until Louis heat really hit in. Louis already felt a light stinging but his mind was still fully with him. His clothes were torn apart by the alpha and Louis eyes got wet. He was thrown at the mattress and held down. He screamed as the alpha entered him dry. Louis didn’t produced slick at that moment. When he is an hour into his heat he would feel slick. It always started with getting hot. Then slick and a stinging in his hole since he got filled with a knot and seed. After a minute of the penetration his body felt already as if he would have a fever. That was weird. It never started that early. His body reacted slower because of the long term suppressant use. But right now, his mind was out. Weirdly he didn’t just thought about alpha and knot. No, a part of his mind was thinking about the heat his body felt. The stinging was a burning. His body wanted release so badly. But he couldn’t really have it. The alpha in his ass was not enough. The burning didn’t go down as the knot popped. He still felt like he was in the sauna. He mouth was dry and throat sore from all the screaming. He had no feeling for time but already hoped it would be over. 

The alpha had many times with him. The burning never got down. It was so bad he started to scratch himself. That only happened when he got no alpha at all while having a heat. It was really hard to breathe for him and the sweat ran down his body like never before. Louis had not enough strength for this. Normally there are small breaks when the knot popped. But that situation just helped little. The heat around the dick drove the alpha crazy. He dug his fingers so hard in Louis velvet skin that it started to bleed. Louis got so many scratches during this time but the heat in his body blocked out the feeling of pain. Well, the feeling of pain for the scratches. But his whole body was in pain. A fire burned his soul away. It got so bad that the thoughts about alpha and knot faded away and he could only concentrate on the burning. He never had something this bad. 

He didn’t know when it really ended. He hadn’t gotten sleep nor water or food. His body was at the edge of unconsciousness. Louis slowly felt the release he needed so bad. He felt the last five knots that popped. Then, his heat was over. The cum of the alpha filled him up. His belly looked as if he was three months pregnant. Every touch on his belly hurt. Within the next few hours the seed would flow out of his hole. Louis is happy he can’t get pregnant. But he cannot help the thought of a little puppy growing inside of him. It made him tear up. He will never have a puppy in him. No kids with a person he loves.

He hadn’t enough strength to roll on his back or look to the door where Dr. Moss entered. He just felt the water bottle and bread put next to him. His eyes slowly opened. He got a few moments until he was pushed at the wall in a sitting position. Louis had to do the rest himself, he knew. So he did. With all he got left. Afterwards the sleeping boy was put into a different room. 

He didn’t know Dr. Morris gave him an injection which shortened his heat. It just lasted three days instead of five. They let him sleep a few hours. He needed it for the next experiment. 

****

Louis thought it couldn’t get any worse. Well, never say that! It can always get worse. He knew that when he woke up in a different room. He was wearing boxer shorts. His scratches did not heal themselves. Normally every omega possesses self-healing abilities. They are important and useful if omegas help an alpha trough a rut and they are a little too rough. With a little aftercare and enough food and rest they would have been gone in a few hours. These cuts were really deep and Louis lost a lot of blood. Not enough to interrupt the experiments but Louis wished he would at least get some painkillers. But that could influence the next experiment so that was no option. 

He sat up in the chair and looked around. He never was in this room. But it looked fairly similar to the other rooms in this laboratory. White walls. The one way mirror. New were the chair he was sitting on and the toilette at the other wall. It was a real chair, not one that looked like the ones at the dentist. That meant it was an experiment they never had done before. Dr. Morris opened the door and locked it. He had a water bottle in his hand. Water! Louis felt how much his body craved it. The doctor stood in front of him. Louis had look up to him and felt extremely weak. Always these power positions the alphas had to get into. 

“How are you Louis?” As if he really cared if Louis was good. But Louis had to carry on. He needed to do his best. And he knew he wasn’t dead so he was good.  
“Good. What are we doing now? I don’t know this room” it never hurt to ask a question. Louis may not get the answer he wants but if the doctor asked how he was, why not voice his concerns? 

“Our next experiment will take place in this room. It will begin now.” The gentleness in the doctor expression faded and a harsh one took its place. **“You will drink this bottle of water! You will not go to the toilette!”** Louis went stiff. These two sentences were alpha commands. He was really confused. But he did as he was told. Louis drank the whole bottle of water which contains half a liter. This procedure happened every hour. Always the two commands. Drink and don’t go to the toilette. Louis had a lot of time to think. Why did this happen? What were they expecting? But after three hours he knew what they intended. He needed to go to the toilette so bad. But the alpha command said he wasn’t allowed to. What should he do? He had to be a good boy and listen to the command. It got really hard to think straight. 

An internal fight took place. One side of him had to listen to the command. The other side had to think about what his body needed. It needed to go to the toilet. But his mind said no! And it just got worse within the hours. After four hours Louis began to cry and scream. He screamed at Dr. Morris and told him he couldn’t take it anymore. But the alpha just gave him the bottle and said **“drink”**. And Louis drank. He drank and drank and drank. He fell from the chair and banged at the floor and cried so much there were no tears left. At hour five he began to scratch himself and had a nosebleed. He couldn’t cope with the feeling of the want to fulfill these two basic needs. Louis was laying on the floor, fingers digging deep holes in his thighs and his body twisting. He began to scream again. It was high pitched. His body smeared his blood on the floor and almost his whole figure was full of blood. He had blood running out of his nose into his mouth and hair. When his fingers were done with scratching his thighs they would scratch his belly, chest and arms. But he didn’t really care about the pain he felt because of the scratching. His mind was occupied by the pain in his lower abdomen. His bladder was full with water but he had to hold it. When hour six descended and Dr. Morris came in with a new water bottle all Louis could say was a chant of _nononono_. He couldn’t take it anymore. His body defies the alpha commands and Louis wetted himself. He felt humiliated. Like a baby. The alpha standing above him and Louis felt the warm liquid running down his thighs and run in the wound. The burning increased and Louis couldn’t hold a strangled scream in. After that he fell unconscious. His last thought was that he is a bad boy. Bad boys don’t listen to alpha commands. He is not a good boy. He is bad. Really bad. 

****

The next time Louis wakes up it is dark. This is familiar to him. He is in the “Darkroom”. He named that room himself. It has nothing to do with photographs and pictures. He named it that way because it is always dark. He has no idea what day and what time it is. He gets no company. after touching around in the dark he felt that there is a mattress, water and bread. No way will he touch the water. He had enough for a while. Louis felt his body. It hurt a lot and he slowly crawled to the mattress. His wounds were still open and he felt no bandages. His blood was a crust and he could taste the metallic flavor of blood. How gross. He reached out for the food and slowly chewed and felt the stinging in his jaw. 

He was a few times in the darkroom. And his fear just intensified with each time. When was the last time he really held a conversation? A week ago? He didn’t know. Louis thought back to his pack. Liam said he would pick him up from the airport. Louis heart swelled a little. Even unintentionally Liam took care of him. But he was still sitting in this dark room with dried pee on his thighs and open wounds. He was cold and had no blanket or clothes that could keep him warm. He was alone. Did anyone even know him? They know the strong and funny beta. But they didn’t know about the suffering omega. Louis curled up and wrapped his arms around his legs. He sniffed quietly and couldn’t believe he wanted to cry again. He was such a crybaby. He deserved this life. But he can’t take that much pain. He is so exhausted. He felt his body giving away. He dropped his eyes and lay on the mattress. He wanted to move but he couldn’t. His mind was racing. He had experienced this before. A drop. But he didn’t want to think about the other time. That would make things worse. He felt really cold and couldn’t really breathe. He had no control over his body. He just knew that he had to get up. But there was nothing. Just darkness. Louis imagined that death would be exactly like this. Dark. Cold. Slow. He imagined himself in a coffin below ground level. With no way to escape. He didn’t know how many hours he was in the omega drop. 

But the scientist knew. 

****

The next few days Louis was between conscious and unconsciousness. They put him in a different room and did other things with him. They took more blood samples from him. Because he didn’t lose enough blood, right? He was put on another suppressant. He didn’t remember anything too well and was glad about that. He couldn’t handle much more. On his last day he was brought to the room he liked the best. This was the bathroom. Now, it was all over. Well, for now… 

Louis stepped under the hot shower and scrubbed all the dirt and blood off of him. He tried to be careful and gentle but the thoughts about the disgusting things that happened to him let him open up a few almost closed wounds. After the hour under the shower, half of the time just enjoying the feeling of water on his skin after nine days of nothing comfortable, he bandaged his wounds. His clothes lay on the bench. It was weird to wear them after wearing nothing most of the time. 

His dad brought him to the airport. Louis had to come up with a really good lie if he wanted the lads to believe he was okay once they saw him. He still felt weak but thinking about seeing his pack and being with them made it better. He fished his phone out of his pocket and texted Liam a quick message when he will arrive. 

He will finally be with his pack for the remainder of the break. Louis felt the smile on his face grow. The first smile since the beginning of the break.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis is back with the boys.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys,  
> I hope you will like this chapter too.

Louis stepped out of the plane and walked down the aisle, his mind occupied with the lie he will tell Liam in a few seconds. The alpha sure wouldn’t buy something like “I fell down the steps” or “You know how clumsy I am”. Because Louis isn’t clumsy nor would he slip on the steps. And even if, he has too many bruises and bandages on his body and a staircase couldn’t hurt him that bad. His excuse is that he got into a fight with some alphas which didn’t go too well. The boys know how forward he can be and how he wouldn’t stop when it’s best for him.

He let his eyes wander around and saw Liam standing a few meters away from him. In his hand was a little Signpost with Louis name on it, over the “i” was a heart instead of a dot. Louis heart swelled at the sight, the sign clearly made by his beloved omega Niall. The tears in Louis eyes were clearly visible when Liam met his gaze and walked towards him, on his face a huge smile. 

“Li! I missed you so much!” the teary hidden omega exclaimed and fell in Liam’s open arms. 

“We missed you too, little one. Good to have you back!” they both stood in the middle of the airport, in each other’s arms, Louis on his tiptoes so he could take a good whiff of the alphas scent in the crook of his neck. Louis didn’t care to play his beta role like he usually did by snapping at them when they called him “little”. He just wanted to enjoy this moment and never let go. But they eventually had to. They couldn’t stand all alone if they didn’t want to get mobbed by their fans. On the way back out they stopped a few times to signature some stuff and take pictures. All in all it was a good time coming home but Louis knew he had to explain some things when seeing the other boys. Liam took over the most of the talking on the care ride and Louis had to bite his tongue if he didn’t want to start purring only because Liam talked. 

The all too familiar house, rather called home, came in sight as the car drove around the corner. It was fairly huge and modern with big windows and some plants outside. They lived all together in the house in a rather secluded area of London. The boys decided to live with each other first of all because they were a pack and secondly because they were family. The house had three bedrooms. One for the alphas and their omega, one for Louis and one guest room. Louis never really liked to be in the shared bedroom, it holds so much scent and it is hard to not let his guard down when he imagines to sleep with them at night. 

Liam drove into the garage and stopped the engine. Louis prepared himself for what was to come. He had many occasions like this over the years with the boys. The homecoming. It is good to see them smile again and laugh with them, but hard to shut down what happened just days before and to make up some funny stories with his dad. 

The front door opened and the other three boys came running, all engulfing Louis in a hug. They were laughing and Niall kissed Louis cheek at least ten times with tears streaming down. 

“he cutie, don’t cry because of me. Everything is fine. Come on, calm down sweetheart.” Niall was a mess in Louis arm. Louis hated it to see his little bundle of joy crying. Maybe these were happy tears but if he didn’t get to control his breathing Niall will be coughing or hyperventilating. ”There we go. That’s better. Show me that lovely smile of yours.” Niall’s breathing had calmed down and Louis ran his fingers through the omegas hair. 

“Let’s go in, shall we?” Zayn suggested and led the way back in. It looked all the same and gave Louis a warm feeling in his stomach. This was where he belonged; this house with his pack, the people that cared about him. They sat down in the living room, Niall on Louis lap and the alphas around them. Good that they have a huge couch otherwise they wouldn’t fit all on it. 

“Why are you so thin Louis?!” Niall exclaimed suddenly making Louis stiffen. 

“I’m not thin Niall.” Louis said while rolling his eyes. “I just didn’t eat that much the last few days. My mum is away and you know I don’t really like the food my dad makes. But I was too lazy to do it myself and I was a lot of partying with my hometown friends. You know how it goes when I drink too much and get pissed.” Louis reasoned. It is easier if he brings up the topic of partying before he has to lie about his bruises so they already knew he was out and believed him. 

“That is no excuse! Harry make him some food. He is skin and bones!” Niall didn’t have any of the lame excuses Louis made. “You know I don’t like it when you are not with at least one of us when you party. Who knows what could happen to you? You can’t protect yourself when you are drunk.”

“Of course I can protect myself! But what about you?” The feathery haired boy smirks and pushed the little omega on the free spot of the couch where harry sat a few minutes ago and began to tickle him. Niall broke into a fit of giggles. 

“No! Stop it, Lou-is! Hahaha! Plea-se!” it was an endearing sight for the two alphas watching them. And hot. Louis above Niall his small fingers running over Niall’s sides. The beta leaned next to the omegas ear and whispered just loud enough for everyone I the room to hear “Beg for it.” 

If the alphas weren’t turned on before they were definitely now! They unfortunately had to stop, because if they let Niall beg they couldn’t stop to get all touchy with the blue eyed boys, but Louis wasn’t involved in sex so they had to interfere. 

“Alright, I think it’s enough Louis. Let him go before he pisses himself” Liam smiled down at them. 

“You’re such a party pooper, Liam.” Louis said but let the omega go anyway. 

“Here is your food. Hope you like it” Harry sat a plate of noodles and chicken on the table. 

“Thank you! Your food is always great Harry so no worries” Louis responded. 

“What were you up to the whole time? You didn’t call or text once. Had some fun time with your dad and some better time with a few blokes on the party, eh?” Zayn asked with a cheeky smile on his face but deep inside him was jealousy bubbling up. 

The guys know that Louis is gay; actually the whole world knows that. The sexuality is some minor topic in the society. People don’t really care if you are gay, bi or straight. All they care about is the second gender. Are you an alpha, beta or omega? Nothing is really looked down on, well in most cases that is. There are still abusive alphas and suppressed omegas. 

“I wish. I mean I had a good time with my dad but there was no fun with others. Me and my dad were camping in the mountains near a beautiful lake. But we weren’t up to much. Just a bit swimming, fishing and talking. It was good to catch up with him. He had some interesting work stories about this new weird alpha. She is no fun and just work, work, work. What a pain in the ass, right? And in the past days I was mostly out with Matt, Daniel and Brandon.” Louis hesitated because he wasn’t sure if he really should tell them about the “Fight”. They didn’t seem to be concerned about any wounds. Most of them are covered and they can’t see them but in a few days they start touring again and they share a dressing room, so they would see him naked. But they will just worry about him if he tells them. And his wounds are pretty bad; he doesn’t want Niall crying because he got hurt. And that would just show that he can’t protect himself. He decided it is better when he doesn’t tell them. “The last time I had fun is ages ago! You wouldn’t believe it” he laughed it off but catches the slightly surprised expressions of his band mates. Just because he wasn’t involved in sex with the pack doesn’t mean he can’t talk about it. He does it not often and when he does is it some crazy story that happened to him while having sex with someone. But now the other lads thought about it. The last time Louis told them about sex was at least a year ago. Did he really not have sex in that long? 

“Can we watch a movie or something?” Louis interjected their thoughts. Liam and Zayn locked eyes in a silent agreement they would talk about the sex topic when they were alone tonight. 

“Of course, what do you want to watch? How about “The proposal”?" Harry suggested. 

“Yeah, sounds good.” The boys made themselves comfortable on the couch, everyone touching someone. Louis would not admit it but he really needed this skin contact with his pack. He didn’t make it through the whole movie, midways he fell asleep and didn’t feel the fingers running through his hair and over his belly and thighs. The hands belonged to all the other boys who did not longer care about the movie. The whole focus was on Louis and his small frame which was going completely relaxed with all the petting and stroking. 

“Wake up, Louis. It is time for dinner” Liam slightly shook his shoulder so he would wake up. After some trying Louis finally was able to focus his eyes on Liam and sat up properly.  
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to fall asleep.” Louis said while rubbing his eyes. 

After dinner they sat around the TV and clicked trough the channel. Harry stopped at some random doctor show. The nurse was giving the patient a syringe with a clear liquid in it. Louis breathing stopped. The memories flooded his mind. Dr. Morris. A syringe. Unknown liquid. Heat. Burn. Rape. 

“Louis are you okay? Hey, look at me. Louis? Can you hear me?” Zayn sat beside Louis and felt the change in him. But Louis just stared at the TV and didn’t move except his shaking hands and harsh breathing after not breathing at all. 

“Harry turn the TV off! Guys help me. I think he has a panic attack.” Zayn’s voice was calm but the others saw the fear in his eyes. 

“What happened?” Liam was instantly in front of Louis, kneeling on the carpet and holding the head of the shaking boy in his hands. “Louis, look at me. Everything is alright. No need to panic. We are all here and won’t leave your side. Calm down. Everything is good.” As if to support Liam’s words Niall and Harry were beginning to touch Louis in attempt to soothe him. But that just shaked him up further. All these hands on him. Where they going to rape him? He closed his eyes and let the tears and whimpers fall. 

“Okay, stop it lads. Don’t touch him. That just makes it worse. He can’t process anything; he is too caught up in his thoughts.” Liam took the lead and made quick decisions. The others were too shocked to see their Louis in such a state. They had never seen him this vulnerable; he was normally tough and independent. 

Liam sat beside Louis and put him on his lap, his nose in the crook of his neck. Maybe Liam’s scent would calm the beta down. And it did help. They were all relived when Louis shaking lessened and his breathing got back to normal. But he never stopped crying. 

“You’re alright, love? Please talk to us.” Harry needed to know what caused this panic attack; he didn’t want to see the beta in that state again and would do everything to prevent it. 

“Yes. I’m good. Sorry for that. I didn’t want to scare you. Thanks for helping me.” Louis answered still a bit shaken up but much better. At least he did answer. 

“What happened, Lou? Why were you panicking?” Niall asked with tears in his eyes. The sight of Louis got into his soul. 

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to frighten you, hon. Come here.” Louis opened his arms to hug Niall close to him. He didn’t want the omega to cry twice a day because of him. “I’m just a little scared of syringes. Nothing big. Sorry, I didn’t know what got to me. Won’t happen again, I promise.” 

“Louis, if it happens again we will be there for you. You should not get through that alone. We are a pack and we love you. You don’t have to keep your tough walls up for us. We will be there for you whenever you need us. Just talk to us.” Liam had none of playing this attack down. 

“Okay, thank you, Li. I will go to my room now. I need to sleep. Sorry but I am really tired. Is it okay if I leave?” 

“When you are really tired you should lie down. Good night and don’t hesitate to come to our room if something is up.” Liam didn’t want him out of his sight, his alpha in high alarm but he knew Louis needed some time alone for him. 

They got all to their rooms. 

Louis didn’t know what happened to him. He had some panic attacks before but nothing this bad. His mind zoned completely out and all he could do was thinking of these days and feel the boiling of his skin. 

He shut the door and slid down on it, his head on his knees. Why did the boys had to be there? Louis didn’t act exactly like a beta. He scented Liam, quivered and cried. He was a bad omega. He did his job bad. Pretend you are a beta. And what does he do? Being a pathetic little shit and crying in the shirt of an alpha. Hopefully they wouldn’t suspect anything! But still, he has to punish himself. 

Louis got up of the floor and stood in front of the mirror. Looking at his pathetic, ugly, fat body makes him tear up but he doesn’t look away. He has to see all the flaws of his body. His fat tummy and thick thighs, but it isn’t enough. He slowly strips but doesn’t dare to look away of the reflection. No one should ever see him like this. Naked. The whole him. They would be disgusted just like he is himself. Louis stands there for two hours; crying and looking at him. Occasionally he remembers some alphas that made him look at him in the mirror when he was in heat and he utterly hated himself for being him. 

Afterwards he swallows his suppressants like every evening. 

Meanwhile, the lads talked about what happened to Louis. 

“Liam, what did just happen? Why was Louis like this? It sure can’t just be about syringes. No one is afraid that bad about them to get a full panic attack” Zayn pointed out. They all stood around the room, sat on the bed or made themselves ready for the night. 

“I have no ideas. But you’re right. There is more to it. We have to help him.”

“Maybe it is just stress?” Harry didn’t want to play it down but he couldn’t correlate with Louis being this helpless. Louis always helped them and watched their backs. 

“How in the hell could that be caused by stress?! Don’t be stupid, Harry! He hides something from us and we will discover it. But we can’t do anything at the moment and I am too worked up to think about it right now. I just want to be hold and cuddled while sleeping.” The omega had spoken. The alphas fulfilled almost every wish for their omega. So they just did what he wanted and didn’t say about the silent tears that streamed down Niall’s face. They just held him tight and were there for him. And he was right; they couldn’t do anything for Louis right now. But they will help him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!  
> leave your thoughts if you like.  
> Your SoSecret


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some golfing and clubbing.  
> Nothing really bad happens.

“Loueee! Wake up sweetie! We made breakfast for you. This is our first real day with each other. Yesterday doesn’t count.” Niall jumped on Louis bed up and down and woke the sleeping beta, who wasn’t happy at all. “Now come on! We will eat and then me and Harry will take you to the golf court. This will be a great way to have a fun time with you. I missed you so much!” To shut the rambling omega up, Louis smiled at him and got out of the bed and into the bathroom. He knows it is not nice to just walk away when the cutest omega in the universe is talking to you, but he just couldn’t be joyful after the last night – and without a coffee. 

He rubbed his eyes and got in the shower. The hot water felt good on his worn out body. Afterwards, he changed the bandages and stepped out of the room, down the steps and in the kitchen where the table was laid with croissants, orange juice, bacon, eggs and other delicious things the boys made for Louis … or more likely for them self, Louis thought.  
“Take a seat; we were just waiting for you, but now that you’re here …” Liam motioned at the table and the other lads walked past Louis. 

“A good morning to you too” Louis couldn’t hold back an eye roll. His sassy side of him always helped him to let the others believe he is a beta; his height obviously doesn’t help at all. 

“How did you sleep?” after Harry’s question they were all looking at Louis with worried expressions. 

“Good. It is nice to be back and sleep in my own bed. I slept so deep you could call me sleeping beauty if you want” 

“Ohh. So you want to tell us Niall was a bad little omega by being unfaithful and kissing you to wake you up?” of course Zayn made a joke, Louis didn’t think it was funny, but laughed anyways. 

“I wish. Who doesn’t want that sweet lips on his own ones?” If Louis wasn’t Louis the alphas would call that a threat but all they did was agree with Louis and kiss their omega. Only if they knew how true Louis words were. He imagined all the boys’ lips on his own and enjoyed it. However, in reality it has to be much better. An immediate scolding followed his thoughts. He has no right to think that way. All he is doing is dreaming, but his focus has to be on the reality and his job. Being a good omega by acting like a beta. The boys would distract his mission. 

****

“Do you really think it is a good idea to golf with him? You know he isn’t the greatest and maybe he won’t enjoy it as much as we do when he is losing.” Harry spoke to Niall while Louis was on the toilette, right before they were leaving for the golf court. 

“Don’t be stupid, Harry” Niall responded with an eye-roll “He will love it! And he is a good loser. Nothing like you. Always so moody after you lost a game and nothing really changes it” 

“I can show you what would change my mood really quick if you want, babe” Harry pressed Niall against the wall and began grinding against him. 

“Lads, please. Not now. We just want to play a bit of golf and I don’t want people to see the boners of you two and Harry snap at every alpha that comes near Niall. So cut it off. Let’s leave.” Some would say Louis was pissed by the behavior of the couple but all he did was playing his role and holding back the feeling of jealousy that was boiling inside of him. If he didn’t control it everyone could smell it and that wouldn’t help. They would just ask stupid questions. Harry let go of the omega and followed Louis the car. They both knew Louis didn’t really care what they did normally, he would just act normal and if nothing happened, but now they smelled some foreign scent on Louis. Neither Niall nor Harry could decipher what that was but brushed it off when it was gone, it was probably nothing. At least nothing to worry about. 

The day together was something Louis really needed. Time to shut down his own thoughts and concentrate on the golfing and talking with the other two. Golf wasn't his favorite sport and he just didn't get it. It is too slow and boring for his liking but he would do everything to make Niall happy so golfing was it for the day. Eating was hard because Louis still wasn’t accustomed to eating that much, half of it was left on the plate and he got weird looks of his bandmates but who is he to care? Of course, he lost the golf game too and Niall won but he didn’t dare to be bugged about it when he saw the grin on the omegas face right in front of him. That smile could literally change the world. At least Louis world, even if it was only for a few seconds. 

“Thanks guy’s, that was a lovely day!” they were on the way back home. 

“Whatya talking about, loulou? The day isn’t over!” Niall was in high spirit, almost bouncing in his seat. 

“Huh? What did you plan on top of that?” Louis shouldn’t be confused because the boys were always on their feet, but it’s their free time. Could they not just once chill out and enjoy a warm bed and some good sleep? 

“We will go partying! That will be really fun. You can’t skip out of that one, tommo. You barley go clubbing with us but now you have the time and you don’t want me to beg with my cute puppy eyes.” The threat of the omega said it all. Of course it wouldn’t really hurt Louis to see those eyes but they just made everyone weak in their knees. 

“You got me, sweetheart. I couldn’t say no to you anyways.” 

“Don’t worry, you still have some free time before we go, Louis. It is rather early and we don’t want to bother you all the time. Just say something if we pester you too much.” Harry looked with an honest expression through the rear view mirror and met eyes with Louis. 

“It is alright. You don’t bother me. I like the attention on me” He was just half joking when he said that. The attention of his bandmates made his omega preen and he felt comfortable around them. But still, some alone time would be good for him. He shouldn’t drown in the attentiveness of his pack. After all he is a beta. 

**** 

Back in his room, alone for the first time this day really, Louis fell on the covers of his bed. He missed the warm and soft sheets. A little nap wouldn’t hurt, so he closed his eyes and fell in a dreamless sleep. When he woke up it was already 10 pm and they always left the house around 11 when they were clubbing. No fancy stuff was needed, Louis just put on a plain black t-shirt and trousers. Looks a bit depressing for partying, but who cares? No one will want to dance with him or speak to him. Louis doesn’t care how he looks; people think he is fat and ugly and there is nothing really he can do about that. When he hits the gym his body is played out and when he stops eating he is too exhausted for the shows. 

The boys could tell Louis wasn’t really pleased with the idea of drinking alcohol and dancing all night but they knew when he had some drinks in the system he would loosen up. The club was a new one and pretty crowded when they arrived. And the worst thing, as Louis thought, was the stares they got because they were one direction. The small, precious omega in the middle so no one could hurt him, his alphas around him and Louis trailing behind them. 

They went straight to the bar and got something to drink; even Niall didn’t have to take a soft drink. Normally his alphas didn’t allow him much alcohol because he got easily pissed and did some stupid shit. 

Afterwards, they got on the dance floor. Louis wasn’t drunk but he wasn’t sober either. Omegas had it in their genes that they couldn’t drink much so Louis was pretty careful when it came to drinking. 

Louis thought he isn’t the best dancer, none of the 1D boys can dance if they were honest, but the music made his body move by itself and it felt good. Just letting go of everything and feeling the beat buzzing through his body. And the hands on his hips … Where did they come from? And the hot breath against his ear?  
“Hey, babe” the deep voice sends shivers all over his body. “Having fun?” 

“Mhhm” Louis couldn’t think straight with this big hands roaming over his ass and hips, eventually squeezing it. He didn’t know when the last time he was touched like this. But he had nothing against it. The guy probably just wanted to have some fun with him and was only interested in his ass and curves, but being used wasn’t something new to Louis. And if he was honest, at this moment he was fine with that. 

They were grinding against each other, the bulge of the alpha on Louis ass. Everything around them forgotten, just smelling the alpha pheromones and his own needs. He needed this kind of attention so bad. He should be afraid this guy would hurt him but his instincts kicked in. No one noticed anything, because betas can be with an alpha too. If it is a one night stand, otherwise it would be hard. 

Louis pack watched the whole ordeal (for them) and blessing (for Louis) with angry expressions. Louis was their beta. No other alpha should touch him this was, but it seemed Louis really liked it. And they were a little bit happy for him because he had fun. But when the foreign alpha tried to take the beta with him to the exit, Louis pack had to step in.  
“Hey, that’s enough for today, say goodbye to him” Liam said with a neutral expression on his face but his hand of the alphas shoulder screamed for a fight if he wouldn’t back off. “Louis, we’re leaving. Come on.” 

“Everything’s good, man. We are just having some fun. Nothing to worry about. He will be safe. Right, babe?” 

The pet name was not a good choice of the unknown alpha. Three low growls erupted in the throats of Harry, Zayn and Liam. 

The alpha immediately backed away from Louis and them. 

“Lads. Lads! It’s alright. He didn’t do anything. Let the poor guy go” Louis got a little bit out of his clouded state. “Let’s go home if you want.” 

Louis was a little sad that he lost the warmth of this foreign alpha and couldn't feel this big, lovely hands on him anymore but was glad he got stopped at the same time. He let his guard down just a little and if his instincts got any stronger he would have slept with this dude. And then he would have regretted it in the morning.

Having their beta back made the frightening wolves to cute puppies. 

But they still couldn’t forget how relaxed and blissed Louis looked when he was grinding against that alpha. Maybe they should do something about that. But right now they all got in the cab and drove home, Louis head resting on Niall’s shoulder.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beginning of the tour.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey,  
> I am thinking about getting kidnapping involved in the story and wanted to know what you think about that.  
> I dont want to give you to much information about the idea because it would reveal a part of the story.  
> Leave your thoughts on that topic in the comments if you want, it would help me decide if I really should do it but I personally like the idea I have. As always, enjoy the new chapter!  
> all the love,  
> SoSecret

Today was the first day of touring after the break. No more lazy evenings with the boys and sleeping long but Louis was exited, regardless. They will sing in big venues, meet fans and write on the new album. And all with his pack, the people he loves. 

They were meeting with the crew in San Diego and flying with a private plane by themselves. No stress for now. But that will change in a few weeks when they are full on writing after the shows and still recording. No time for anything else, hopefully no one will be ill, otherwise they will have to push through it and just act like they are fine because it was really hard to convince management to skip out of a show. 

The morning was kind of uneventfully, nothing new. Driving in a car, getting on the plane, getting off the plane. But something was off. Something didn’t feel right. Louis couldn’t decipher what it was and it made him nervous. He had no time to get ill so it better not be an upcoming sickness. 

The band got on the tour bus and drove to the stadium where they would do their sound check and concert. They had their usual spots on the bus; everyone chose the bed they always had. The pack managed to get a big bed in the back of the bus. It was Harry’s idea; he didn’t want to be away from his mates even when he slept. Of course they didn’t use it all the time. On eventful days they were just too tired to care and fell right asleep. 

Sound check went really well. They all sang great and had fun being back on stage. Obviously they enjoyed the break but this was where they belonged. On the stage in front of thousands of people. It was their favorite thing to do: performing. 

Everything went well that evening. Louis had no bad dreams and the bad feeling was almost not noticeable. But that changed when he woke up. The others were still asleep what made Louis breathe out in relief. He didn’t need some alpha smelling around his problems. When he got in the toilet he did his usual routine and dressed himself. The underwear felt tighter this morning, just slightly uncomfortable like his ass itself. There was a little stinging and he would love to scratch his hole but that would be weird. Who does that? So he got on with his live and didn’t pay any further attention to it. Maybe it was just his mind playing with him or his hole screaming for an alpha to just take and fuck him. Better not. 

Louis never really had much sex and he didn’t play with himself, he just feels stupid when he jerks off and it doesn’t give him the pleasure he would like to have. He doesn’t produce slick and he just once had sex with another man and that was before the band. Of course there were some guys he snogged at parties but nothing major. 

“Hi Lou, slept well?” Harry was always an early riser and made most of the time breakfast for the others when on the bus. 

“Hey, yeah it was okay.” Louis didn’t want to really talk. He had no real reason for it but he did not felt at ease. He thought about calling his mum. She would tell him some fun story about her colleagues to keep his mind occupied without doing something. 

“You want some pancakes? Or cereal?” and there was the caring and lovely side of Harry Styles. As much as Louis loved his cooking but he couldn’t keep anything down right now so he said no. 

“We have an interview in a few hours. Just relax a bit, you seem a little tense” Harry said. 

“Yeah, you’re right. I will just lie down. Wake me up when it’s time, please.” Maybe extra sleep will help to bring his mood up. He can’t be like this the whole day. 

****

“One Direction! How are you? Good to see you!” the interviewer, a lovely beta girl with blonde hair and a nice smile, asked and got a chorus of good, great and how are you’s back.

The interview went really well, lots of questions about the album and their music or something related to it. The boys understood when the fans and people liked to know some personal things about them but they didn’t like to discuss their relationship and answered most of the time with a funny remark and nothing serious. 

But then there was a turn. Now they got to the intimate questions, nothing too bad but still a little bit uncomfortable. The girl asked about wedding plans … that don't exist and baby plans … that don't exist. The omega got a little squirmy in his seat and Zayn next to him had to put a hand on his knee to keep him calm. Kids and wedding were sensitive topics to them because they loved each other but had no time for children. Of course they will get kids in the future but the stress would be too much for their omega. And still, Niall loved children and couldn’t wait to have his own. He often dreams about having a whole football team and imagines his alphas caring dearly for them. That image makes his heart swell and if it was only his choice he would already have kids but he had a responsibility being in the band. They could get married but they didn’t want the focus of the pap’s and society on them. When they marry each other they want a small ceremony only with their family and closest friends, nothing big. 

And when she was done with the alphas and their omega she got on to the beta of the pack. Louis. And he wasn’t happy about his questions either. He gets them sometimes but it is always hard for him to answer them out of the perspective of an actual beta. What if his answers were not accurate? What would happen when they discovered in this interview he was an omega? His palms were sweaty and he had to contain himself. Nothing is going to happen. They won’t find out!

“Louis, how is it going with the blokes? Any admirer?” That was one of the simple questions. 

“Yeah, it’s going fine but nothing serious. My focus is on the music and I have no time for a relationship.” 

“Do you think about having a relationship with an alpha or omega?” 

“No not really. That probably wouldn’t work out but I’m open to it when it feels right” he is getting kind of annoyed. She is doing an interview with the whole band. There shouldn’t be two questions in a row directed at him. And surely not this kind of questions!

“How are the pack dynamics? Sure enough you are a beta. Do you take part in certain activities?” Okay, that was plain rude. Louis was no longer having anything of that. 

“I am sorry but I won’t answer that question. That is just rude and not professional.” Those were Louis last words before he left the room with rage visibly on his face. The others weren’t impressed either. 

“This will be the end of this interview. Cut the last question out or you will talk to our lawyer.” Liam said to the remaining beta and run after Louis with his mates following. The last thing he saw was Louis going through a door which opened to the outside of the building. 

When the rest of the band arrived at the sidewalk they saw Louis pacing back and forth. He seemed stressed and agitated which is no wonder after that question. But it is weird how everything came back to sex in the past few days. Maybe he was sexual frustrated. Liam had to talk with the other boys about his thoughts but now he had to calm his beta down. 

“Hey Louis, it’s okay. I spoke to her. She won’t put the last question in the article. You don’t have to be this angry, just forget her.” Liam did his best; he grabbed Louis softly by his shoulders and looked him in the eyes. But he did not just saw anger but also sadness. Why was Louis sad? This whole situation didn’t make sense to Liam. Harry, Zayn and Niall let their alpha handle the situation and only stood behind him. “What is up with you? Talk to us. Please” 

And who was Louis to deny their alphas request when all he did was taking care of him. And he was too churned up to care about his beta appearance. 

“I don’t know what’s up Liam! I feel just so off. As if I am ill but I am not and my feelings are all over the place.” He was nearly shouting and his eyes watered slightly. The distress was clearly visible and the boys were shocked by Louis behavior. They only see him on rare occasions like this. Now, they all got closer to him and tried to touch him and be there for him. In that moment it wasn’t important what got him riled that up, they just wanted to calm him down and make it better. And it helped. Louis slumped on Liam’s shoulder and took deep breathes. He felt his pack around him and the warmth that radiated from them. But on the other hand that made it even worse. The question of the girl swirled around his head. In what activities of the pack took he part? Sure, she meant sex but he obviously doesn’t partake in that! And other stuff? Cooking? Sleeping?  
Shopping? No, no and no. He is still part of the pack but more like an isolated part. There, but no really. He is not needed. What even is he to them? Maybe only a band member. A work colleague. And they are living with him because it is easier; they can drive together to “work” and discuss some topics about songs and band right away and don’t have to call. He pushed himself away from Liam and got out of the circle. 

“I need some time to myself. I will be on the bus if you look for me” His voice was small and stained. Nothing the loud and sassy self he is. But the others knew they could do nothing anymore, he needed space and he was a beta, they didn’t need all the petting. They needed their alone time without other people constantly around them bothering about their problems. 

Louis was exhausted, mentally and physically and just wanted to escape his situation. But there was no solution, if he left the band his father would only use him more and if he ran away the whole world would search for him (a famous member of One Direction). 

When he sat down on his bed he rummaged around in his bag in search for his suppressants. The tiny pills that ruled his life and his personality. His life would be different when he never got on them. It could be better or worse. All the scenarios he imagined when he turned out be an omega. Getting kidnapped, raped or sold off when he wasn’t careful. But he didn’t think about suppressants. With all their side effects he had to go through. But he didn’t want to think about that. He just had to swallow the pill like every other day. Once again denying his inner omega and himself. 

But he didn’t denied them really when Liam was there for him on the street. No, at that time he was acting like a pathetic little omega who can’t cope with some stupid interviewer. Letting his feelings overwhelm him wasn’t something that he was familiar with just because something was going against his liking. That normally just happened in the laboratory. What was wrong with him? He should make up for his behavior. No food for him this and the next day. Of course this day was almost over but the last time he ate was this noon. He would be starved by the time he eats again. That seems like a good punishment to him. He will learn not to act out like that again. 

He was lying down on his bed, trying to fall asleep but the stinging in his ass got once again prominent since his thoughts weren’t occupied by other things. It was kind of hurting him now and moving around didn’t help at all. So Louis did what he always does when he couldn’t rest, he took a pill, a sleeping pill but they still had influence in his system and messed with him. He wonders how long his body will last until it already breaks. But until then he will be good.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys have a present for Louis...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good morning,  
> I want to tell you how much I appreciate you comments, especially those who commented on the kidnapping. It means so much to me and I love to read what you thought about the chapters! Thank you!! xx  
> Just so you know, one bit at the beginning is based on a real interview with Zayn and Harry.   
> I hope you like this chapter too,  
> Your SoSecret

„We need to talk, guys.” Harry, Liam, Zayn and Niall were still lying in the big bed, some of them fairly sleepy but Liam’s serious tone shook them awake. “Something’s going on with Louis and we need to help him. You saw how he acted yesterday and he never is that puzzled.” 

“But it is understandable with those questions thrown at him. I wouldn’t like to answer questions about my sex life for the world to hear. Do you remember the time this one rude alpha of an interviewer asked Harry and Zayn how many times they did have sex? That’s the same situation and they weren’t pleased either.” Niall said. 

“Yeah, that one was bad." Zany agreed, nodding in Niall's direction. "But what do you really mean by helping him Liam? Do you want to offer him a massage or by him a muffin? He will get over it. It was just some cruel question and you would act similar to Louis or worse if it was directed at you.” Zayn said confused. What was Liam hinting at? 

“I mean there is more to it than just the interview. Think about the question itself. Maybe it triggered something in Louis? We don’t have sex with him.” Liam tried to explain his thoughts further. 

“So you mean he wants to have sex with us? Are you crazy Liam? You know he isn’t in love with us. AND he is a beta, that wouldn’t work out. Maybe once or twice we could fuck him but it surely would affect our relationship negatively.” Harry got on his forearms and looked at the others with a frown. As much as he'd love to have the petite boy under him and shagging he couldn’t let that happen. All his rational thoughts spoke against that. 

“I didn’t mean he should have sex with us, Harry. But maybe he didn’t have had sex in a long time and is sexually frustrated. When was the last time he talked to us about one of his ‘adventures’? He hasn’t in a long time and that doesn’t fit to his persona. He would rub it under our noses if he could. But he doesn’t. So, why? I think because he has nothing to tell us.”  
“Or maybe he has matured and just doesn’t want us to know what he does with others in privacy.” Zayn countered. 

“And that bloke in the bar? He was grinding at him as if there was no tomorrow. We didn’t help him with dragging him away before it could get more heated. Now he has all this want in him and noone he could have fun with. We are on tour now and privacy is difficult to get and he knows that.” Liam had a pained look on his face, shame evident in his voice. He knows they shouldn’t have got jealous of that guy but it happened and now Liam blames himself for Louis reaction the last day. 

Niall sensed his alphas feelings and tried to calm him down. “You had nothing to do with that, sweetheart. You did nothing wrong. And even if you want to help Louis how would you do that?” 

“You will think I am crazy when you hear what’s on my mind” Liam didn’t seem so confident anymore but the smile on Niall’s face boosted up his confidence and he was sure that the loves of his life wouldn’t run away when he told them. 

“How about … we give him a dildo as a present?” The others stared blankly at him. “I knew you would think I am crazy. But it is a good idea. He is gay and dildos bring pleasure, you know that the best Niall.” 

“First of all, yes you are crazy. And second of all how do you know he bottoms? If you ask me he isn’t the kind to bottom.” Harry didn’t want to assume things but Louis personality made it hard to believe he was anything else than a top. The stories he told them about years ago were all of him as a top so why should that have changed? 

“Just because we give him a dildo doesn’t mean he will use it Liam! I’m not even sure he would accept the present. And how do you want to give it to him? I don’t want to be the one with a dildo in my hand and awkwardly giving it to my best friend. And wrapping it up and sticking a little note to it would be weird too. I don’t know what came to your mind. And I will think about him using it and that’s just too strange. Furthermore, I would enjoy the thought but he is still my best friend. I don’t think I can do that Liam.” Zayn rubbed his hands over his face once he was finished. Liam’s idea was not a good one. Everything could go wrong. Louis thinking they are strange. Him using it and maybe thinking about his pack while using it. Them thinking about Louis using it. Louis rejecting the present and being all awkward about it for the next few days. They couldn’t look each other in the eyes or speak to each other. Anything could happen and Zayn didn’t want to risk their friendship. 

“I don’t think it is particularly a bad idea. But if it was to me I would give him a vibrator, they are so much better.” Niall was the only one thinking about it positively except for Liam who was thankful for his omega to be on his side. If Niall thought it was a good idea then his alphas would think that too. “I get you two but I also agree with Liam. Even if Louis isn’t sexually frustrated having sex or something similar is always good. It could take the edge off of Louis and help him relax a bit. I would prefer giving it to him ourselves so we can explain it and if he doesn’t want it we can still take it back. But we are a pack and I don’t think we need the feeling of shame and insecurity between us.” 

“And how do you want to buy a vibrator? We can’t just go into a store and pay for sex toys. What if someone recognizes us?” Harry still wasn’t pleased with the idea but more open to it when his omega was sure it was a good idea. They all knew Louis but Niall had a special bond with him. 

“We could ask one of our coworkers to get it for us. Buying it online would take too much time for my liking so what about we ask Paul or Lou.” Liam suggested with a shrug. 

“Oh my god. I can’t believe we are really doing this. Asking one of them is so embarrassing. Why can’t we just do it ourselves? I would even take the risk. Just please don’t let them know what we want to do.” Zayn whined and rolled onto his stomach to hide his face in the pillow. 

“Haha, if you really want to do it love we won’t hold you back. Have fun with picking out the best for our lovely Louis.” Harry sneered at his fellow alpha. 

“I think we should talk about size and color beforehand, just to be on the right track. “ Liam said with a fond smile as Zayn pressed himself further up into the pillow. 

Their next stop was Santa Clara. They drove the whole night so they would be there in an hour or so. Then their plan would start: Zayn disguising himself and finding a sex shop nearby, buying a vibrator for Louis and getting back in time for their breakfast. 

Louis was still sleeping and didn’t register anything around him happening; the lads had enough time for everything without raising too much suspicion. When Zayn came back his cheeks were bright red and his posture was stiff. 

“Here, I got what you want.” He said and pulled a package out of his bag and threw at Liam. 

“Thanks love. You were so brave doing this trip alone! I’m really proud of you.” The tender kiss of Niall made Zayn instantly calmer and his effort was worth it. 

“Is he still sleeping?” After the others nodded he continued sitting down on the table in the front of the bus “Okay, did you came up with a plan of how we want to give it to him?” 

“Yes, we will give it to him tonight after the show when he will be a smiley little child and won’t go for our throat’s.” Harry said and put their breakfast in front of everybody. They didn’t want to wake Louis, he needed the rest after the last day and they needed their time for discussion. 

“I hope you’re right. He doesn’t need more stress than he already has.” Zayn answered with a full mouth. 

****

Louis was knocked out because of the sleeping pills and only woke up when Niall slightly shook him. He didn’t want to face his bandmates and the rest of the world, all he wanted was being alone, preferable in his bed. But of course he had deeds and has to get up when he wanted to perform tonight. 

_Weak, pathetic omega. Can’t get over one stupid question and drowns in his self-pity._

“Louis you have to wake up we need to leave soon. Come on, sweetie.” Niall was slowly stroking Louis’ hair who had to hold back a purr of contentment. 

“I’m up, I’m up. Just give me a minute.” Louis voice was raw and his body hurt. He didn’t want to move out of fear his body would not cooperate. After Niall left him alone he tried to sit up and hissed in pain his ass stung like fire and he felt it up his spine. Louis didn’t let the tears in his eyes fall and told himself to man up. It got away when he sat a few seconds in this position but when he got out of the bed and moved towards the bathroom it came back, not as much as before but still distasteful. He needed to know why he had this pain to stop it although now was not the time. He had to hurry even when he didn’t need to eat, his punishment still present because of his growing hunger. He didn’t eat for a whole day and today would be stressful; no time to take long breaks. And he deserved his grumbling stomach and the feeling of nothing climbing up his throat. He deserved his pale face and the cold sweat forming on his forehead. He deserved the black spots forming and dizziness because he was moving too fast. He deserved his chewed up lips because he had to hold himself back from whimpering and limping when get got from sitting to standing. 

The show was shit. Well, the others made it really great and the fans enjoyed it but Louis felt like shit, sang like shit and looked like shit. He got concerned looks from everyone around him but ignored them. He couldn’t let his state rule this show! He needed to smile the pain away and compensate the lack of his voice with bouncing around which just resumed in more pain and more grimaces that should look like a smile. But who could he fool? Not even himself, so why should it work with the people around him?  
He could barely hold himself up after their performance ended. Going straight to the loo and slid down the door, finally allowing himself to relax a bit. 

Meanwhile the rest of the pack stood in their dressing room and had a conversation about their plan. 

“He looked so knackered lads; maybe he is ill and only needs some sleep and not some sex toy!” Zayn hissed at the others a furious expression on his face. 

“Maybe you’re right, but what if not? He probably didn’t sleep much last night. That could be all. I don’t want to wait any longer with the gift.” Liam argued. He knew how Louis looked, he saw it himself; Zayn didn’t need to rub it under his nose. 

“You choose, alpha. If you think it is a good idea I trust you.” Zayn slumped down on the sofa and let his head fall in his hands. He did trust Liam, but he did not think they should do this tonight. It would be better if they waited some days. 

“Zayn, it is not about authority but about Louis wellbeing.” Liam sat down next to Zayn and laid one hand on his shoulder. 

Before they could talk about that topic further Louis entered the room with a tired smile. 

“Hey, Lou. How are you feeling? And don’t lie to us” Niall demanded with a soft voice stepping closer to Louis. 

“Fine. Can we go to the bus? I need some rest” The beta had to drag out the words and felt like a baby while saying them but if he didn’t get some easing then he would pass out. 

“Of course, love. Come on. Can you walk or should I help you?” Harry was right next to him rubbing small circles on his lower back. 

“I can walk by myself, thank you.” Louis rolled his eyes, trying to play the tough beta who doesn’t want to accept help. 

****

The end carts of the movie rolled down on the screen and the alphas and their omega looked at each other with pensive faces. Louis was sitting relaxed between them; everything seems good so they started the last phase of their plan: the gifting. 

“Louis? We have a present for you. You looked kind of stressed the past few days and we wanted to help you. You don’t have to accept the present as it may seem strange and you will think we are joking but just know we are here for you and won’t be offended if you don’t want the gift.” Liam said with a tender voice not wanting to startle the beta. 

Louis raised suspiciously an eyebrow “You … have a present for me? That’s the joke itself, Liam” a small chuckle left Louis mouth as he watched Niall standing up and going to his bunk bed. When he came back a few moments later he had a box in his hands. 

“Please don’t assume any wrong intentions from us. We just want you to relax” Niall gave the box to Louis with a pleading look. 

“Calm down, love. I won’t rip your heads off if I don’t like it. It is nice I even get a present for doing nothing” he looked at the others with an encouraging smile. “I am just going to open the box and see what’s in it, alright?” after the simultaneous nodding of his pack members he unwrapped the box and had a purple … stick … looking up at him. 

“Are you giving me a curling iron? Or what should that be?” he slowly reached in the box and pulled the thing out. What the hell was that? He turned in all directions and found settings on the bottom. He switched it to number one and the stick began to slightly vibrate against his palm. 

Louis began to stiffen. It wasn’t a curling iron. It was a vibrator. The moment he realized that it was a vibrator it slipped out of his hands and he wiped them furiously on his trousers. 

“Louis? Hey! Are you okay? It’s okay if you don’t like it. Oh my god, we probably shouldn’t have done it. I’m so sorry!” Liam took Louis face in his hands and turned him so he could look at him. The betas eyes were torn open, staring in the distance. 

_When a naked Louis got in the small room of the laboratory he saw one of these gynecological chairs. He didn’t knew what will happen to him now but he didn’t like this. Dr. Morris entered the room and instructed Louis to take place on the chair. As he was kind of comfortable the doctor tied his ankles, wrists, thighs and chest down. He couldn’t move one bit, only throwing his head from one side to another. What would happen to him? He was never in this position before. He heard a whirring sound and felt how his legs moved apart, spreading in an uncomfortable angle, almost hurting. He didn’t dare asked the doctor what is going on because he was afraid they might gag him._

_In front of him was a strange looking machine placed. He had never seen such a thing, but nothing good could come from it if it was in this place._

_Dr. Morris spread lube around the stick and rolled it right into Louis hole. He wasn’t prepared and he didn’t produce slick so the stretch made him tense up. After Dr. Morris left the room Louis watched him enter the room behind the window. This room had no mirror in it. Louis could see the people watching him, enjoying seeing Louis this exposed with a knowing smirk on their lips. The omega turned his head away; he couldn’t endure them watching him; every movement he made, seeing into their eyes and not knowing what is going on._

_There was a sudden movement in his ass. The stick moved in and out of his hole while vibrating at a low setting. He never had this sensation running through his veins after he experienced it a few minutes. The slick was now running down his ass creek and dropping onto the floor. Soft moans were leaving his mouth and his body was going lax only tensing when his first orgasm rolled down, wanting his legs to quiver but were held down by the leather straps._

_The vibration intensified after his first orgasm. He wasn’t in heat and felt the affects the machine had on his body, straining it and tiring Louis. But the pleasure was still there, working on his second orgasm after some time. The pleasure was overwhelming him and made him slick even more. He wondered how long they were going on like this. But after that he wished he hadn’t had thought that when he felt the vibrations being switched one setting up._

_The doctors behind the window slowly wrecked his body. The vibrations were too intense for Louis liking and he was coming dry after his fifth time, silently crying._  
_He didn’t want to feel the stick going in and out of his hole, stretching him more and more, going faster and faster and vibrating stronger and stronger._

 _After what felt like hours and probably were, he reached the point of screaming out his lungs for the doctors to stop the machine, stop the pain. His body wanted to move away but the bonds held him down, splitting his skin open._

_His mind was going against everything that happened but his body produced still slick and he dried orgasmed every once and then, leaving him sobbing, clenching his fists._  
_The vibrations were on the highest setting, leaving Louis in pleasure and pain from having enough._

_He couldn’t cope with this anymore and felt him slowly begin to slip. Slipping in the dark cold area. He didn’t know what this was, he never experienced it before. His body began to stiffen and he had no longer control over anything happening. He felt the stick still moving at a murderous speed but he didn’t feel the pain he had a moment before, nor the pleasure mixed within it. Everything began to slow down, making every second he had to endure an eternity. Not being fully with him but not fully gone. Feeling the coldness and darkness in front of his eyes. He couldn’t see anymore and panic rose in his chest. He finally realized that this was a sub drop. How was he supposed to come back all by himself? He had no one that could help him. He was alone. No one was there._

“Louis! What’s going on!?” Liam shook him and watched carefully for any signs of Louis getting out of his own thoughts. The other three watched in shock. This was the second time in a few days Louis zoned out. Guilt was rushing through their veins because Louis reacted to their present this badly. It was their entire fault Louis was once again in this state. “Talk to us! We will listen. We are your family. We will be there for you.” 

_We will be there for you._

The words were ringing in Louis ears. Since when was someone there for him? He had to go through this alone. No one was there to help. 

He got out of his haze and shook his head, answering with a shaky voice “Sorry. It’s fine. I just remembered something unpleasant but that was a long time ago. Nothing to worry. Unfortunately I can’t accept your present but thank you for even wanting to give me one.” 

“Are you kidding? Nothing is fine!” Harry stood above Louis with an angry expression. “I won’t let you down. WE won’t let you down. We are your pack Louis. So please, please tell us what happened to you so long ago when this reaction is the result.” The alpha lost his furious tone and ended with pleading the beta to trust them. 

“Louis, you know you can talk to us about everything. We won’t judge you” Niall piped in. How could Louis resist this gorgeous omega? 

“I know, I know, sorry. It is just … I never told anyone about this and I am not planning on. So could we please drop this? I want to sleep. Please, Niall. Not now.” Seems as if Louis could resist this omega. Not for long but for this evening. 

He didn’t want the boys to know about the experiment that has to do with vibratos. The sex machine. The sub drop. Doctor Morris told him afterwards that they did all this because Louis needed to produce as much slick as he could. They wanted to create a lube similar to the slick of omegas. The beta thought that was a great idea and his suffering was for good. But he still didn’t want anyone to know what he had to go through to be helpful. His pack would only suffer itself if they knew about Louis. He needed to protect them.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some small flashbacks to Louis "childhood". You will get what I mean.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys,  
> I have some news for you which you may not really like. I don't like them either.  
> I will be in france form the 9th september to the 14th and won't be able to uptade next tuesday.  
> But I hope I will be able to upload the chapter on the 15th or 16th.  
> After that the schedule will be like usual. Sorry, for the change but I don't have time to update before I am in france.  
> I hope you don't mind too much.  
> Your SoSecret

Louis woke up with a headache and the excruciating pain in his lower body. He reached to his smartphone next to the pillow and was blinded by the bright light that was coming from it. 4.30 am. The grunting beta slammed the phone down on his mattress. It was way too early for being awake and the pain made it hard to fall asleep again. He stared up at the ceiling and thought once again about the possibilities where the pain could come from. Living in the 21st century he naturally googled his symptoms … which wasn’t a good decision. He typed in pain in anus and read some article about hemorrhoids, anal thrombosis and anal fissure. As more precisely symptoms were listed traces of blood, lumps around the anus, anal itching and biting pain or pressure. After his research he got to the loo, squatted over the mirror and looked at his bum. How embarrassing, but what should he have done instead? Going to the doctor was difficult with the boys and staff around. But nevertheless he feared he had to go if it got any worse. He could barely walk or sit.  
He was constantly in pain and had to remain emotionless when anyone was around. The only solution that came to his mind was calling Dr. Morris. 

He dialed the doctor’s number, even if it was this early in the morning, and hoped he was awake. After some beep tones an angry voice was heard on the other end. 

“Why are you calling me? This has to be really urgent when you are willing to wake me up” Louis shivered at the underlying threat that was audible in the alphas voice.

“I am sorry to wake you up but it is urgent.” Louis said in a hushed voice because he didn’t want the boys to hear him if they would want to go on the toilet. “My anus is in pain, there is blood and it is swollen. I don’t know what it is or what to do. Please help me" 

Louis told the doctor everything. He rushed the words out; hoping Dr. Morris would knew what was wrong with him. And he knew. 

“I am sure that are side effects of your suppressants. You should have called me earlier you stupid boy! You have to immediately stop taking them! Do you still have your old ones with you? If so, take them. We will have to rework the ones you are taking now.” 

Side effects. Louis should have known what it was. These aren’t the first side effects the suppressants brought with them. 

“Okay, I will do that. Thank you.” The line went dead. Dr. Morris hung up without a ‘good bye’ or a ‘you’re welcome’. 

The beta stared at his phone. He was in a state of slight bewilderment. The whole investigating on his problem took him only half an hour. He got back in bed but couldn’t sleep. He laid with his back on the mattress, looking up in the darkness. 

He remembered the first time he noticed side effects from his suppressants. 

When he presented with 15 his dad took him to the scientist which gave him his first suppressants. Some small green pills, which he took every evening so no one would notice he actually is an omega. 

They worked pretty fast and after a week he got back to school, faking he was sick. No one was interested what happened to him, he had not much friends, if you could call them that. There were a few people he eventually talked to and knew their name but he sat alone when he was eating or in class. There were some stupid alphas that held a grudge against him because he wouldn’t back away when it was better. He knew not all betas were this dominant he pretended to be but his dad told him it was better he would be extra dominant so no one would suspect something. Most of the times the fights were because Louis wouldn’t step out of the alphas way ore give some sassy remark about them. He remembered the one time, the first time. 

_Louis was standing against some random locker in the school corridor. It was some boring day; he just had English and waited for the break to be over so he could do something with his time and not stare dead ahead._

_“Step away” in front of Louis was standing a huge alpha, with too many muscles for his age, glaring at him with his dark brown, kindless eyes._

_“Or what?” provoking wasn’t the right decision in this situation but being the kind of beta he represents he has to be rebellious. What would happen? A broken nose? Some blood? A lecture from the principal?_

_“Or you will need a new set of teeth if you don’t want to obey an alpha. So step away!” the guy made a step towards Louis and slammed his hand next to Louis’ head down on the locker but the beta didn’t flinch instead he moved a steep forward, raising an eyebrow._

_This one step was enough for the alpha to have enough of him and grab his hair on the back of his head. It hurt a lot but Louis didn’t want to whimper and appear weak so he looked the alpha in the eyes. When the alpha let go of his hair to push Louis onto the floor and punch him, he had so much of Louis’ hair in his hand that it couldn’t be pulled out from pure force. That fact was the only thing worrying Louis at that moment, not the alpha ready to knock out his teeth or the teacher coming up their way, screaming at them to stop fighting and get off each other._

_The alpha didn’t care about his hair and didn’t noticed Louis state of shock and hit him in the face before he was pulled off of the beta by Mr. Hunter. Louis was dragged along to the principal’s office and kept touching his hair, going with his fingers through it, pulling out tufts of his hair. Who cared his nose was bleeding?! Fuck, his hair was falling out all of a sudden!_

_And it kept falling out for the next days. He was scared, in his helplessness he called Dr. Morris because he was the only doctor he knew better. He was the one hiding the fact he is an omega. He could surely help him with this problem too. Louis didn’t want to go bald with only 15!_

_And Dr. Morris helped him once again. Louis owed him so much for the past years. He helped him with all his side effects by giving him new suppressants. Louis was really fortunate to having this great doctor!_

_The side effect subsided over the weeks and he had his full hair growing back._

Louis sighted. Remembering what his first side effect of the suppressants was was not pleasant.

He got out of the bed and made himself a tee. He had nothing to do and he sensed this day would be long. Too long for his liking. 

And the tee made him think of another of his side effects. He had too many of them over the years and couldn’t get away from them. But this was his life, this was normal for him. He doesn’t know how a normal teenager would live because he never experienced "normality". He remembered the few years before he presented but that was so long ago that it seemed to be someone else’s live and not his. 

_He was 17 when he woke up one morning in the summer. He got dressed and did his deeds like every other day. Making his siblings and himself breakfast and snacks for school. Making his dad coffee and waking his sisters up. Washing up after they ate and going to school. Louis felt the warm sun on his skin but he didn’t feel warm himself. Over the whole day he had shivering attacks, which didn’t subside once he made himself tee at home and almost burned his tongue._

_The hot-water bottle didn’t help either. So he once again called Dr. Morris. He prescribed him other suppressants and got on with his live. As if nothing happened. Because of the new suppressants he couldn’t sleep very well and his grades got worse. He had to endure the lectures of his dad every evening, who was screaming at him. He lay wide awake on his bed and had to hold back his sniffles because he was sure his dad would hear them, come to his room and brought him to the basement were a mattress was. Exclusively for him if he wasn’t behaving well. If the coffee had too much milk in it. If his grades got down. If he couldn’t help his sisters with their homework. If he didn’t clean the house. And the list goes on and on._

He snapped out of his thoughts when his lovely sunshine stepped in the kitchenette and smiled at him. 

“Hey Lou, slept well?” the blonde sat down next to Louis with a mug in his hand, waiting for his answer while slurping his milk. 

“Mhh, and you?” Louis was half mumbling into his tee, not meeting Niall’s gaze. 

“Yeah, it was really good! I had a weird dream about someone amputating my lungs but other than that.” Niall had still his smile on his face instead of being paranoid about the dream. Louis would have freaked out even if it was just a dream. He was more sensitive with this topic because he had some really bad dreams in his past. 

“You should analyze that shit. It could mean something, you know. Maybe your subconscious wants to tell you something” He looked at Niall with a cheeky grin taking the deeper meanings out of his words with that. 

“Haha. I don’t believe in that Louis. But thanks for your concerns. I will get dressed. You should do the same. We are leaving in a bit to the stadium.” 

“Yeah will do. See you later” Louis remained in his seat, looking in his cup of tea before getting up and pouring the rest of it down the sink. 

Getting dressed was going on slow and painful. But he had to bite trough that. Noe one could know what was going on and moving like a snail wasn’t helping. 

In this stadium they had separate dressing rooms, giving Louis some alone time for relaxing and giving the others time for doing whatever. 

Letting his thoughts wander back to the side effects while lying on the couch he thought about the ones he had during the first tour of one direction. It was the first time he had to hide his problems to his friends and didn’t let them help him. Asking them for other things like bringing him his jacket because he forgot it and was occupied by other stuff was easy. 

He constantly had a nose bleed. Of course not all the time but every few hours. Running away when someone was calling your name and trying to not let the blood run down on your clothes was certainly exhausting. He was afraid his nose would bleed when they were on stage or during an interview. He was afraid he would raise suspicion. He had always tissues in his back pocket. After losing much blood he felt dizzy and changed his suppressants after Dr. Morris told him to. But every suppressant had one side effect at least. 

And that brought him back to his current situation. He didn’t dare move a muscle out of fear it would hurt too much. They would need some time to subside when he ingests his old ones. The old ones, the ones he took before the two week break, were some rather large baby blue pills and gave him a rapid heartbeat – and not in the good way – and circulation problems. These were one of the good ones. He needed some time sitting after jumping around on stage and should not get up too fast but other than that his live was relatable normal. 

A knocking on the door made him sit up, watching Liam stride into the room. 

“You coming? The show begins in a few minutes” the alpha stood awkwardly at the end of the couch and fiddled with his fingers, still not over what his pack had done to Louis with the dildo. The all so strong alpha was still embarrassed. Louis thought it was cute; at least he did care about the beta. 

“Yeah just give me a minute” Louis waited till Liam left and made is way over to the door. Resting his hand on the knob he prepared for the next few hours. 

This day surely was too long.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyyy :)  
> I'm back from the trip (it was really good!) and have the new chapter for you.  
> Sorry again for the long wait but the next one will be up tuesday.  
> I hope you like it, this one is a little bit shorter than normally so sorry for that too.  
> have fun while reading,  
> Your SoSecret xx

The side effects of his last suppressants lost their ability and Louis had no longer pain in his ass. His new blue pills did their job perfectly; hiding his scent and suppressing his slick production. But they did nothing to his everyday wants like cuddling, general body contact, scenting his pack like every other omega, purring and submitting. He had to do the hard work all by himself, holding back in the most tempting situations. Just like lying on the sofa in the tour bus, watching a film and not jumping right in the arms of the alpha next to him. Not pressing himself against the palm on his shoulder when someone wants something from him, focusing really hard on the voice and the content of the words and not on the warmth that goes from the hand to his body. Not being jealous of Niall in every moment the small one just goes to one of his alphas and sniffs at his neck, getting rewarded with a kiss just for showing affection and love. He has not many reasons to purr because there is not much in his live that brings such happiness but every time a pack member praises him he holds the gleaming in his eyes, purring in his throat and the grin on his face back and only says thanks before he goes out of the room, searching for a lonely place to let it all out. Not submitting is the hardest of all of them. Not falling to his knees or baring his neck when he hears the demanding tone of an alpha. Not giving in when he thinks his idea is better than someone else’s even if he deep down just wants to do it their way. 

The new side effects were already kicking in but Louis knew how to handle them. During the last two shows he was running around and couldn’t decipher if his heart was thumping this rapidly because of the adrenaline or the pills so he just got on like everything was fine. Which it was. Noting happened and he didn’t take a break to sit down, he drank more water and concentrated on his breathing so he wouldn’t get any problems in front of the fans and his band. There were some black spots in his vision but he pushed through it and got to the end of each show with a good feeling. 

The show this night went a little bit differently. Nothing too bad but still not as smooth as Louis has wished for. He felt a little drowsy all day and had to sit down a lot because he would have fallen straight on the floor. No one noticed his “Laziness” and the people watching their show didn’t seem to mind his mostly sitting performance. He compensated it with big smiles and his sass. It was near the end when he had to stand up for one of their songs and he moved to fast. He swayed a little and swung his arms around in search for something to hold himself onto because his vision went for a few seconds black and he had to concentrate not to fall. He felt strong arms gripping his biceps and looked up into Zayn’s eyes when he opened his. 

“You Okay, Lou?” Zany asked with concern clear in his voice, holding Louis close just in case he was ill or something. 

“Yeah of course, sorry I just got up too fast. Nothing major. C’mon we have a song to sing we can’t just stand here and have a little chitchat, Zayn” The beta got out of the alphas grip before he could respond and went to his microphone while secretly looking around if someone saw their encounter. 

Some girls in the front row were screaming in their best friends’ ear and looking at Louis with a frown but he just got on like normal. 

It was at the end of the show when he began sweating more than normally and had a hard time to breathe. He threw his arm around Liam’s back and grinned in the bright lights before running off of the stage and right into his dressing room. He sat down on the couch and grabbed with his right hand his shirt, feeling the too fast beating heart. With his left hand he wiped the sweat away from his face. The other boys came into the room, all too high on adrenaline and swat themselves to notice Louis abnormal breathing and behavior. 

“He Lou, you wanna come with us tonight? Were gonna go clubbing.” His sweet little omega threw a bottle of water at him with a wide grin on his face. Louis’ hand moved rather slow in attempt to catch the bottle and missed it. The others began laughing and Louis would give a sassy remark but his body had not enough energy so he just picked the bottle up and greedily drank the water, feeling the liquid running down his esophagus cooling down his whole body and clearing his mind. 

“Yeah, I’m coming with you Niall” the words were out of his mouth before he could think twice about it. Louis was sure he said yes because his little sunshine asked him and no one else. But now he has to go, no way back when you see Niall’s happiness. The smile was contagious and Louis opened his arms to let the small one cuddle in his side. It was a rarity that Louis showed affection and Niall was immediately by his side and sniffed at his neck even if his beta had no specific smell he enjoyed the gesture and tried to show that he cared for Louis. 

Louis sighted and caressed Niall’s hair and cheek with his hands breathing his scent in and feeling himself relax. He didn’t want to let him go but he didn’t want to raise suspicious looks either because he cuddled on the couch which he never did. 

“I don’t want to interrupt you two but you should shower before we go to the club and we want to go in the next hour or so” Harry’s voice was quiet because he didn’t want to startle his omega. 

“Yeah, sure. Hey, sleepy head I’m going to shower now, see you later, buddy” Louis laid the omega slowly down on the couch and went away after he got a drowsy “mhh” from Niall. 

****

As they were sitting in the cab that drove them to the club Louis was on twitter and realized there was a hashtag about betas. Louis was curious about that because he was a beta himself and a lot of people seemed concerned about them. 

He clicked on #HelpBetas and scrolled trough the tweets. 

“Hey lads, did you know about these people who kidnap betas??” He looked up from his phone and met the quizzical gazes of his best friends. Louis was bewildered by the fact that not only omegas had to be careful now to be snatched away from the street but betas too. What was this world becoming? 

“No, what do you mean Louis?” Liam was leaning over Zayn to have a look on the phone and read a few tweets. 

“Oh my god. 30 betas went missing in the last three month? How could we miss that? And why were they kidnapped? This makes no sense” Zayn said when he had a good look on the tweets. 

“30? That’s much. In which region?” Niall piped in. 

“Canada and US. The last one was in Edmonton a week ago. We are in Edmonton guys. Maybe we should stop at a pet shop and by a leash for me so one of you can lead me around like a dog and I won’t go missing too.” Louis let out a small chuckle at his own words. 

“This is no time for joking Louis! 30 people went missing and weren’t seen again. We don’t know what happen to them. Maybe they are dead by now. And I don’t want to hear you say something this rude again. Imagine their families and themselves worry about their lives.” Niall shrunk down in his seat at the tone of the alphas voice. But Liam was right and Louis knew that but he tried to hide his fear by a joke. 

“Sorry. I shouldn’t have said that” Louis avoided the eyes of the furious alpha and looked down at his hands. 

“We should hire some more security guards and talk to Paul. This is serious” Harry said to Liam and Zayn. Neither of them wanted their beta getting kidnapped and they would rather overact than be sorry in the end. 

“Yeah you’re right Harry. We will do that in the morning. For now, we just have to be extra careful.” Liam was still tense but knew that he had to enjoy this evening or it would be a waste. 

No one drank too much this night and watched the people around them like hawks.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis gets kidnapped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey,  
> Sorry my update is a few hours later than expected.  
> There is a sedative mentioned but I didn't enlarged upon it because it doesn't exist in reality I think (at least not entirley).  
> Tell me what you think about the end ... I as a reader always hate things like that but now ... You will get when I mean when you are at that point. Have fun!  
> Your SoSecret

„Oh my god. My head is killing me“ Louis plumped down on the seat in the kitchenette of the bus and let his forehead crash against the table. 

“Yeah, we know what you mean” Niall wasn’t that used to alcohol because he as an omega often chooses to not drink. Their body didn’t get rid of the effects that easily and if he gets a hangover it is pretty bad. Normally his alphas would stop him from excessively drinking but yesterday they were too caught up in their observing of the surroundings. 

There was a glass of water standing in front of him when Louis looked up and a smiling Harry standing next to him petting the beta on the shoulder. 

“Thanks. I need loads of that.” Louis downed the water. 

“We will have an interview this afternoon and we will drive to Winnipeg this evening. How about a little sightseeing before we have to leave?” Zayn called from the back of the bus where he put his clothes on and made his hair. 

“I’m in! I want to go to the West Edmonton Mall. It’s said it’s huge with a swimming bath, golf and many stores. I need to stock up my pants guys, so were going.” Liam appeared from his booth and sat next to his angel, kissing him all over the face. 

“Lou? You coming too?” Niall asked the hangover long forgotten. 

“Yeah, why not? I don’t have stuff to do anyway so why don’t go to the mall …” 

“Great! Then it’s set. How about we leave in an hour? That should be enough time to make oneself presentable.” Harry walked backwards towards his booth to get himself ready, a big grin on his face and thumbs up. To say he was existed for his pack to have some time going out was an understatement. He was even happier because the beta said he would come with them. That only happened once a month if it wasn’t for partying. 

Today would be a great day. Harry could feel it. 

****

“What about this shirt, Li?” Niall had a cute button down shirt with small butterflies on it. 

“It is Cute, just like you. I love it, just like you” the statement following was a deep kiss in the middle of the store getting everyone else embarrassed but not the boys themselves. Well, Louis was embarrassed. And jealous. But the others were getting quite aroused; kissing each other and seeing their boyfriends kiss each other, slowly taking their omega in their mind apart. 

“Oookayyy … I will just leave you here alone ….” Louis whisper-shouted to the boys and hurried out of the store not wanting to be in there anymore when the loves of his live are making out with each other and he will never have a chance. 

The boys didn’t register Louis leaving them. 

And Louis didn’t register the man following him. 

He strolled through the shopping arcade not searching for anything special but halting as he saw an Adidas shop. 

“Nice” He muttered under his breath with a smile ghosting over his lips. 

When he got in the store and went behind some racks he felt a tight grip around his mouth that prevented him from screaming. A sudden smell got into his nose and made him woozy, his wide opened eyes closed and opened again. Within a blink of an eye he felt the grip disappearing and looked behind him to see a tall man with a brown beard and hair and a nose like a hawk. The sunken eyes had a sparkle in them as they saw Louis dazed state. 

“Hey, my name is Garry. I have a little problem with my car and I would like you to help me if that would be fine. What is your name?” He asked despite the fact that he already knew who he had in front of him. Louis Tomlinson. Member of the world famous boyband one direction. And a beta. 

Garry has done some research because he had an eye for complicated cases like this one. But in the end he was disappointed it was this easy to kidnap him. Of course he now still had to take him out of the mall without rising suspicion and without Louis friends head on their heels. 

“Nice to meet you, I’m Louis. I would love to help you with your car. I have time right now so you could take me to it right away.” His voice was monotone and his eyes peered into distance. 

This encounter is going better than Garry has expected. He had luck the boys didn’t take their bodyguards with them but from an interview he knew they wouldn’t cause that much of a sensation when they were alone. He was near them for a few days and it happened to be the best chance he could get. If some people would see him talk to Louis they would think he is a fan or maybe his daughter and they met coincidently at the mall. Garry waited some time for the separation from the other boys and doubted the beta would ever leave their sides but (un)fortunately he did. 

“Of course Louis. You are very nice. Just come with me and smile a little, it is really beautiful” Holding a nice conversation was a good cover up if any cameras caught them. He knew as soon as Louis bandmates got a whiff of him missing they would call the police and security, following every step of Louis. But then they would be far off. 

The masses around them didn’t pay attention to the pair and they got safely to the underground car park. 

“Which car is yours and what’s wrong with it?” Louis looked around the many rows of different designs. 

“This one. It is inside so you have to sit down.” Garry lead the way to a blue golf. 

Without further questions Louis sat down at the front-seat passenger and watched Garry starting the engine. 

“I thought it is defect. Why did it start? And where do you want to drive to? I don’t want to make a trip. I will leave now. I can’t help you but it was nice meeting you have a good day. Bye.” 

Before Louis could open the door he heard a clicking sound and as he tried to open them up he couldn’t. Garry had activated the child safety lock. There was no escape. 

****

The fog in Louis brain went slowly away and he had now full control over his mind and limbs. What happened to him? He wouldn’t go with a stranger to his car in his right mind. But he did. Louis tried to remember what he did before he got in the car and followed his thoughts back to the Adidas shop. Garry has drugged him. 

He looked around the room he was currently in, white walls, a bed he was lying on and a sink. No windows. This seemed really familiar. 

“Hello? Garry? Is someone here?” It remained silent as Louis got nearer to the door which he hoped was open. It was not. 

With a sigh he let himself be led to the bed and brought his arms over his face. Why did he always get in such complicated situations? Does god hate him? Does Garry hate him? They have never met each other before and he couldn’t think of anything he has done to anger him. Not in this extend. Maybe he had a daughter and Louis didn’t want to take a picture with her … who knows? 

But one thing was very clear: he was trapped. 

Just as Louis thought about drowning in his self-pity the lock of the door was twisted and it swung open, revealing his kidnapper Garry. 

“Hi, Louis. I see you are totally awake now. That is good, we can start then. Come with me please” The too friendly smile was plastered on his face. 

“I will definitely not come with you! What did you do to me and why am I here?” In his rage the beta stood up and made some steps towards Garry, holding a fist up in a threatening manner. The next thing he knew was that he felt a hand grabbing his neck and pushing him against the hard wall, splitting the skin of his forehead. He felt the warm blood run down his eyebrow and temple. 

“You will come with me, Louis. You don’t disobey me, do you understand?” The hot breath of Garry washed over his ear and a cold shower run down Louis back.  
“I have survived worse than you, bastard” The grip around his neck tightened, leaving fresh marks. 

“You think? Let’s test it.” Louis was pushed inside a dark corridor with doors on both sides leading the way many meters to the end of the last door. The beta was unsure if he should open it and looked warily behind him, getting a nod from Garry he pushed it open and went into a big room with many chairs and tables forming an U. Some of them were taken by other men. As the two stepped in some of the guys looked up from the work they did on the tables in front of them. Some of them looked surprised (maybe they knew Louis status?) and some of them had an evil grin on their face. 

“Garry, my congratulations, I didn’t believed you could actually kidnap a celebrity.” The man who spoke stood up from the chair on the other side of the room and strode over to them. “Let me look at you, beauty. You will be perfect for or studies hopefully. I would love to have you, darling” the grey eyes mustered him up and down, taking his chin in one hand forcing Louis to look up to him and stroking one cheek. “What happened to your forehead, love? Who blemished your face, you can tell me, don’t be shy.” 

“Don’t call me love. I am not yours and never will be and your friend Garry pushed me against a wall so don’t act as if you care” Louis grabbed the man’s hand and pushed it away from his face. 

“You won’t be so cocky when we are finished with you” the conviction was clearly heard in his voice and a stern look was set on his face as he spun around and walked away while saying that Louis will be his and only his. 

“Come with me. We don’t have all time in the world” Garry led the beta to a nearby room with instruments spread around, looking faintly like a doctors room. “Sit down in the middle on the chair. We will do some tests now. It is nothing bad, trust me. We just want to see if you are a candidate for our studies and if not you can go or stay.” 

“What studies? What did you gave me in the mall? Where are we? Why did you choose me? You know my band members will search me with all they have” Just as he wanted to ask the next question he was interrupted by Garry.

“I gave you some sort of sedative so you would stay calm and one ingredient made you more obediently, don’t worry it didn’t harm you in any way. I can’t tell where we are because if you are not fitting for our studies and you chose to leave then you would be able to tell others and the police would be here in no time. And I can’t tell you what we study because of the same reason.” Louis began to believe Garry wasn’t a bad man, he just believed in this study with his whole heart. And Louis liked that. Maybe the study was for the well-being of the citizens. 

“And if I chose to go I can? You won’t stop me?” Some would call him naïve and some would say he trust people and has faith in them. 

“I really hope the test will be positive Louis.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am really curious about what you think of this chapter ;)  
> Enjoy!  
> Your SoSecret

„As much as I love seeing you two kiss we should not do that this excessively in public. Stop it please, or I can’t stop myself boys!” Harry voice is stern but an amused expression ghosts over his face. It was truly hard to seperate this lovebirds – his lovebirds. 

“Me too, believe me. But you’re right. Niall you by this shirt and then we will go to the golf court, we know how excited you are for playing” with a last pat on the butt and kiss on the lips Liam turned around to his alphas. “Where is Louis?” 

“He was standing right besides us. I didn’t remember him saying anything about leaving. But he can’t be far away.” The black haired alpha span around with a frown and looked at the spot Louis was standing five minutes ago. 

“We should search him guys. He wouldn’t just run away. Let’s wait for Niall and then ask around in some shops if someone has seen him” Liam suggests, taking easily the lead.  
They were asking people for thirty minutes if they have seen Louis, with no success. They were slowly getting anxious, it wasn’t usual for Louis to go missing, well not if he specifically was spending his time with his pack. Betas tend to do things alone if they need their freedom but if Louis needed space he would say goodbye and then go. 

“This makes no sense! Where could he be? We checked the toilets, restaurants and stores. This building is huge. Maybe we should call the police or start something on twitter, let people watch out for him.” The curly haired alpha ruffled trough his hair. 

“Yeah and then? Cause a worldwide panic attack? I thought you are smarter Harry! Our beta is missing! What if he is on the roof top and wants to jump? Or he got kidnapped? Maybe he is already dead” Tears were streaming down Niall’s eyes as he thought about what he just said. What if he was right and they couldn’t help him? They are completely useless! 

“Niall, hey lovely keep calm, come on, you can do it. Don’t think about death. He is still alive. There is no reason he should kill himself. Just breathe. Yeah, just like that. Good boy. We love you so much.” Liam’s soft voice spoke right into Niall’s ear as he was pressed to his alphas chest, feeling the slow heartbeat and smelling rain and grass. 

Meanwhile Zayn spoke to Harry, who was losing his mind too. 

“We can’t call the police yet, love. You have watched enough movies to know someone has to be missed for at least 24 hours and he is full-aged. Of course he is a celebrity but we should talk to the security in the mall before. Maybe he got lost in another wing or something. You have to keep calm for the sake of our omega, okay? If he works himself up like that we have to drop him and this is not a good time for that.” 

“I know sorry, Zee. What about calling him? Oh my god, I can’t believe we didn’t come up with that the first second.” 

“Oh god! You’re right! Guys! Come over. We haven’t called him yet!” Zayn tipped on the Louis name in his contacts and waited for his voice to come up, but it didn’t. Instead the voice mail answered and the alpha furiously closed his phone. “Okay, next stop is the security. He is missing an hour now and we can’t find him. Let’s get us some serious help. Come on, sweetheart, we will find him, no need to worry.” 

****

“We have the results now, Louis. Come with me to meet the others and discuss everything.” It took only 10 minutes after the test started. 

“Is the test negative? Can I go?” Louis hands were sweating, anxious about the result. He feared it was positive and he had to live in this area now. Whatever that all entails … 

“You will get your answers eventually, don’t be so greedy. No one likes that.” Garry led him to the room he already was in, with the tables that formed an U. His kidnapper took place on one of the chairs on the left side after he pushed Louis down on the chair in the middle of the table-formation. 

“As you all now, I kidnapped Louis Tomlinson two hours ago and have received the test results. It is a very interesting result; we never had a similar situation, so we have to do a vote for our next steps. I don’t want to keep you all on tenterhooks so we may begin. 

To say Louis was nervous was an understatement. He didn’t know what these studies were for or what these people wanted of him. But he was to find out in a few seconds. 

“The results are negative.” Louis let out a deep breath as he heard that he could leave this strange people behind and didn’t have to think about it anymore. But he will also never know what a positive result means. And just because he is curious he would have liked to hear it wouldn’t be negative. “You all know what this means. Normally, we would let them go now, but in this case the beta has something special on him.” 

****

“Sir, could you please check you cameras in the sector we were in an hour ago? Our friend got missing and we might be able to find him with your help.” Liam spoke to the head of the security after they introduced themselves. 

“Of course. You have to tell me what wing you were in and what shop, the exact time would be helpful too but we can skip to two hours ago.” The boys were glad this man wasn’t unreasonable. Now, there was definitely a chance to find Louis.

“Okay, do you have a picture? I don’t know how your friend looks like.” The guard looked at the four boys with an expecting glance. Niall took out his phone as fast as possible and showed him a picture of Louis that was recently made. 

It took them all some time to get to the time Louis left the store and walked down the hallways. Following the betas steps with the cameras was remotely easier than they thought it would be. It brought them to an Adidas store and they impatiently waited for Louis to come out again. When he did, he wasn’t alone as expected. 

“Who is this man? And what does he want from Louis? Can we follow them both?” Zayn’s request was fulfilled as everyone saw that Louis went with the stranger to the basement car park but they still didn’t know what the man wanted from their pack member. 

“They both got in the car. Are you kidding? The fuck! Louis doesn’t drive with a stranger and doesn’t tell us! Can anyone decipher the car registration number? Now it is time for the police!” Not even Liam could stay cool-headed. 

“Oh my god. This does looks like a kidnapping and no one can convince me of the contrary.” Niall became pale and sunk down on a chair not moving a muscle in his state of shock. 

“Thank you so much, we will do the rest alone. I have noted the registration number and we will call the police. Have a good day.” Liam ushered his pack out of the room, well dragging Niall out, and immediately had his phone in his hand. While waiting for the call to be put through he told Harry to call Paul and bring him up to date. 

Everything was arranged. The police checked their cameras in the public places and called out for the car number, going through the registrations of it and came up with a Garry Morgan, living in Minnesota. They were describing him and everything matched with the stranger Louis went with. This was the man who kidnapped Louis. Their beta. This Garry will pay for what he has done. 

****

“His test is negative, because we can’t change anything about what he is. He already is what we want him to be. Louis is an omega, my dear friends.” 

As Louis heard Garry’s word, his breathing stopped and he looked at him with a shocked expression. “How … How do you know? No one is … supposed to know that. No. no, you can’t.” 

“Oh I can Louis. I originally didn’t want to tell you anything about our studies but now I think we can. I will change some things for you. You are still free to go, but only after we are finished here. There is a lot to explain.” 

Louis didn’t care if they now wanted to satisfy his curiosity, now he wished he could turn back time and fought when he had the change. Or endured his bandmates kissing each other when all he wanted to do was run away. He did run away, that way his mistake. He should have been strong and everything would be alright now. No one would know his secret. 

In this moment Louis promised himself to never run away again. 

“Now is the best time to vote. Should we let Louis go freely and hope he doesn’t tell anyone what happened to him or should we keep him? He would have no function for us due to him already being an omega and not having the ability to test our _medicine_. Keeping him would cause some problems because he is a celebrity and millions of people would do everything to get him back. It is your choice but mine is to let him free. He still has another function. Let us vote.” 

“Who is for keeping him?” Some hands shot up but it was clear the majority of the council was for letting him free. It seemed as if they trusted Garry and encouraged his ideas. 

“Who is for letting him free?” Garry still asked even if the answer was clear after the first question. “Great. Thank you very much. I will take Louis now to the local park and fill you in when I am back. Come with me, omega.” 

Louis was still shocked and didn’t move. Why should he? He was let free but Garry talked about a function he had. Which one? Did they want to use him when they have ruts? He didn’t want to be their little bitch. 

“Move, omega. Now.” His kidnapper and possible rapist stood in front of him giving him a stern look that didn’t held much room for waiting in it. 

Off to the local park then … 

**** 

“Paul, good to see you” Liam ran over to their security guard to tell him the police found the car. “It is parked a few miles away, near a park. You drive with Paddy and Preston and I with my boys. Drive behind us. See you there.” As quick as Liam was by Paul as quick did he run away again. 

They drove 10 minutes and sprang out of the car as they saw Louis sitting on a bench with the kidnapper. What was going on? 

“I don’t understand. You are not supposed to sit around and chat with you kidnapper, are you?” Niall looked between his alphas with a confused gaze. Instead of giving his omega an answer they took his hand and walked towards Louis. 

The beta didn’t seem really scared but comfortable was far away too. He looked up from his lap and met the looks of his pack. Relieve washed over him. There was his help. 

“Louis, remember what I just told you. Don’t say a word to them. You know me from one of your fans. I am her dad and you thought I am nice so wanted to talk to me in silence and not a loud mall.” His brains registered Garry’s words but he didn’t care. His pack did search for him and they found him. 

“Louis! Oh my god we are so happy we found you! You can’t believe me what a terrible feeling it was to know you were kidnapped.” Niall was the first one that hugged Louis but was closely followed by the others, ending in a group hug. 

Now was the time to tell them he wasn’t kidnapped. They didn’t do tests with him and decided what should happen to him. Garry was just a nice father. Nothing more. Louis thought about his last conversation with Garry. He has told him he was a member of the organization that kidnapped betas. He and his friends kidnapped the 30 betas. They kidnapped them to make omegas out of them. Their “Medicine” as Garry termed it was an injection of dubious ingredients to turn betas into omegas. Stealing their free will and sense for freedom. Stealing them their lives with their families to breed them and sell. And why? Because they were unworthy. They had no real function. They needed to be removed. The organization tried to develop a medicine for betas to be and alpha or an omega. They started with omegas because they could be more useful for ruts. Garry didn’t phrase it that way but Louis knows what he meant. His kidnapper wants money from him. He agrees to let Louis free in exchange of money. He needs the money for new equipment. 

So what should Louis do? Tell his pack he wasn’t kidnapped and everything is fine. Live with the knowledge that more and more people will lose they family member because of him? Live with the knowledge that some might die because of him? Live with the knowledge that he was aware of the organization and didn’t do anything against it?  
No. he couldn’t do that. He had to tell the truth. The whole truth. No running away again. Not from his past and not from his future. Never running away again! 

“Sorry. I should have said something. I should have done something. Anything. I am so sorry!” Louis broke free of the hug. Remembering Garry’s words but not listening. The first time in 7 years deciding himself what was best and didn’t let others rule his live. This was his life, not theirs. He wouldn’t hold back anything anymore. He was done with that shit. It only brought him sadness, stress, loneliness and illness. He doesn’t want these things anymore. He wants a better life. A life that is worth living. And he decided this was the moment he would get this life. 

“Louis what are you talking about? This is not your fault!” Harry declined. 

“Louis? Harry is right. What are you talking about? I didn’t kidnap you? We talked about my daughter, she is such a big fan.” Garry stood up from the bench. Louis might have backed away if he didn’t just tell himself that he wouldn’t run away. He would face his problems now. 

“No, Garry. You did kidnap me. You don’t get to blackmail me. This is my life, not yours. Mine! Everyone always held me up from saying the truth but now it’s time. I am thankful for the events today than otherwise I wouldn’t have found the strength to tell everyone what truly happens in my life. I lied so many years but now it is over. I won’t run away again. Never.” 

“Louis? What are you trying to say? About what did you lie to us?” Liam looked hurt at Louis just like the other boys. 

“I am an omega.”


	11. Chapter 11

Louis stared in the shocked faces of his bandmates. He did finally say the truth. After seven years he told them he is an omega. The seconds without any further reaction dragged on. What were they thinking about him now? Did they think he joked? Or that he lied to them? Louis has just said he lied to everyone and maybe his pack thinks he is lying now too. Saying he is an omega because he wants attention or they don’t say anything because they hate him. He didn’t tell them the truth for five years. Who would want a band member and friend like that? They hate him now! He is pathetic and untrustworthy. They will kick him out of the band. The earth stands still while Louis thinks about all this and tries to process what he just has done. 

The other boys needed time for processing themselves. They were all shocked and confused. Why did Louis tell them he was omega? He was clearly a beta. They never doubted his second gender, they wished he could become truly one with them by joining their pack and that would have only become real if he was an omega. But the facts were different. Louis didn’t like to cuddle and needed his freedom. Betas couldn’t be deciphered by their height like omegas and alphas because they could be small, average or tall. And Louis didn’t have a precise smell. He smelled like his deodorant and shampoo. How should they deal with the new information? And they would lie if they didn’t think only for a split second about Louis lying to them. But why should he. Even if he just said he lied to them his whole live he sure as hell had his reasons. This man had something to do with all this. Louis was on first name basis with him and didn’t seem to be scared of him senselessly but he said he got kidnapped by him and blackmailed. 

It felt as nothing happened for an eternity what were only a few seconds. Garry analyzed the situation a lot quicker than the others and ran away. The alphas snapped out of their shocked states when they saw the suspected kidnapper running away, leaving the two ...?... omegas behind. Liam who was very fit because of all the muscle training caught Garry first and got help from Zayn and Harry. Garry didn’t put up much of a fight; he knew he didn’t have a chance with three alphas against him, as they brought him to Paul who called the police. How should they explain what happened to Louis? They didn’t know it themselves. Something they had to change immediately. The omegas stood unaltered, facing each other, Niall still in shock and Louis now with tears in his eyes. 

“Louis?” Liam’s voice was quiet because he didn’t want to startle the omega. It was obvious he was vulnerable, bewildered and distraught. 

Louis eyes shot up from their former starring position to the alphas eyes. The tears finally spilled and heartbreaking sobs were heard from the petite boy. Niall was ripped out of his paralysation and walked slowly towards his best friend. He carefully pulled him into a hug and rubbed his back while whispering reassuring things in his ears. 

“We shouldn’t hold this conversation in the middle of a park, Liam. Let’s get back to the bus.” Harry whispered with his eyes searching for people watching them. 

Zayn heard Harry’s comment and nodded in agreement. Liam slowly headed towards their embracing omegas and put a hand on Niall’s shoulder, not knowing if Louis would be comfortable with an alpha this near to him after his confession, they still didn’t know why Louis hid being an omega. The blond one knew what his alphas wanted and told Louis they would go home. He didn’t fight back too caught up in his own world, still thinking they would reject him. 

During the ride to the bus they all had time to think about what would happen in the next few weeks. It was no question to the pack that the newly outed omega would become a part of their pack. If Louis wants to belong to them. When was the right time to ask him? The alphas were questioning themselves. Could they be strong enough to bring them all save and sound out of this situation? Clearly, their lives would change drastically and they had a lot of pressure on them with one probably traumatized omega and one equally distraught one. Many hard conversations would occur in near future. 

The boys sat down in the back of the tour bus; Liam and Niall next to Louis on the couch and Zayn and Harry in front of them on the opposite side. Harry held tissues out to Louis who reached for them and blew his nose with the loudness of an elephant. Everyone was looking at him, waiting patiently for him to finish. 

“Can you explain what happened today? You were suddenly not there anymore and we were really scared. We don’t condemn you or anything. We want to understand why you ran away. Whatever you say we won’t judge you. Please Louis, be honest with us. We want to help you.” Zayn spoke slowly, with his whole heart, looking Louis deeply into the eyes, trying to tell him he can trust his pack without saying it. 

“I didn’t run away. You were caught up in other things and I told you I was going but no one heard me so I just went. When I found the Adidas shop and was looking around Garry kidnapped me and brought me to the secret hideout of his organization. They did a test with me and kind of let me free. Garry tried to blackmail me and that was the last straw that broke the camel’s back. I had enough. Enough of hiding and being the playball for everyone. That’s why I told you. And now you hate me. I understand you don’t want me to be any longer in the band. I lied to you all the years. I am a horrible friend. I am horrible. Horrible. Pathetic. Disgusting. Stupid. Failure.” Louis hands had a mind of themselves and wandered down his legs, fiercely scratching while the omega kept on babbling how bad he was if the alpha next to him hadn’t stopped him. The trousers did their best and prevented Louis from bleeding. 

“Stop, Louis. You are not disgusting, pathetic or horrible. We don’t hate you. We love you! We love you so so much! Don’t ever think something else.” Liam pressed the omegas hands against his chest with one hand and turned his head with the other one, looking Louis into the eyes but only seeing a faraway glance and tear streams on his cheeks. Niall had to hold himself back from crying, not good at handling seeing one of the dearest person in his live being distraught and hating himself. As they were all a little bit calmed down they carried on their conversation. 

“Do you know what organization it was? What did they want from you? They didn’t hurt you did they? If so then I will kill them!” Zayn clenched his hands at the sheer thought of someone hurting Louis. But he had to keep calm if he didn’t want the omega to be scared of him. 

“They are the ones who kidnap betas. I was something like the trophy because I am hard to get due to me being famous. They tested if I am a potential candidate for attending their studies. They search for a medicine to transform betas into alphas and omegas. But I already am an omega so I wasn’t beneficial. Garry had the idea to demand money from me, if not he would have told everyone I am omega and end my career.” Louis sounded exhausted, not near to crying anymore. The omega didn’t register wholly what his confessions mean and told them as if it was normal. But they can put a stop to the kidnappings thanks to Louis because he was strong enough to stand up for himself and blow the organization’s cover. Now they were coming to the really important part of this talk. 

“I assume you are taking suppressants, Louis. And you know they are highly dangerous. Why did you choose to take them? Why did you hide being an omega?” Harry looked with hurtful eyes at the omega, not understanding how someone could hurt themselves for such a long time. He didn’t want Louis to be hurt and suffer, all alone the whole time.   
“Yes I do. I didn’t really choose myself. My dad took me to these scientists when I presented and they gave me the suppressants. It was not my own idea. I don’t think being an omega is a bad thing or something.” He looked at Niall and smiled a little “You are a very cute omega. And I have no problem with being one myself.” 

 

“What scientists?! And when did you present?” Liam looked alarmed at Louis. They got to know Louis from a whole different angle and what if this new look on the former beta wasn’t a good one? What would they learn about him? The pack thought Louis wanted to keep his freedom or something and took the suppressants because of that and not because he was urged to. 

“When I was 15 I presented and my dad took me to Dr. Morris, one of the scientists, who is doing tests with me. But it is all for the common wealth! They search for new, better suppressants and I am lucky to test them. If the side effects are too worse I tell them and I get to take my old ones before I get new pills.” Louis’ smile grew when he said it was for a good cause. 

“You took suppressants for seven years?!” Niall exclaimed, shocked that Louis was still healthy enough for touring and working hard. 

“Yeah. Why?” the outed omega didn’t know why his band mates were looking at him with bewildered expressions. 

“Your suppressant box is confiscated. Please bring us your pills. We will take you to a doctor tomorrow the police will likely take your statement about what happened today” Liam looked at Louis with a stern look and no room for discussion was left even if Louis seemed as if he wanted to obey Liam. The omega got up and was after a few seconds back with a box with blue pills and gave it to the alpha. 

“Things will change from now on, louis. We will help you with everything and be there for you. I think it is better if we leave everything like it is right now and get to rest. The police will be here in a few minutes and after that you will sleep in your bunk bed. Tomorrow is a new day for further conversations. We have enough information and turmoil for a day. 

Later the police had the whole report from Louis who then went to bed after he got a “good night, sleep well” from every band member. He thought about everything that happened that day but couldn’t tell what felt different. He was still the old one. The pathetic omega. But now he was not hiding anymore. He wasn’t hiding behind the façade of a free beta. His friends said they love him. But maybe they were lying just like he has all the years. Nothing would change. His suffering would go on, now in the body of an omega. And no one could help him.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey!   
> New update! Just so you know, I am no doctor or anything so sorry for any faults.   
> Have fun,   
> Your SoSecret

23.7.2015 

The day after the boys found out Louis is an omega. The day, they will take him to the hospital and make a check trough to see if any of his organs are majorly damaged. The day they will talk to him what happened in the past and maybe what will happen in the future. And most important the day they formed a band. Now, they were five years together. Now was the time to celebrate. But what should they celebrate? Being five years together but not seeing one of their greatest friends has suffered all the time? Celebrate he may has some serious damage because the other four were too caught up in their own little, beautiful world? Celebrate because they don’t know Louis as the Louis they thought he was? It should be a happy day. The beta is finally free and can live as he should have his whole live. Their careers are going incredibly well and they are working on their fifth album. But that’s just not the truth. Their fans massaged them all on twitter and congratulated them on their anniversary. The fans are happy and don’t know what goes on behind the scene. But the pack wasn’t sure if they should come clean now, they have to talk to Louis about everything. When he wants to come out, what about his family and friends, heats and most important if he wants to be their boyfriend and be in their pack, not just as a friend. 

The boys were currently sat in a waiting room in the hospital of their choice. Patience was not with them this morning as they looked around every few seconds for Dr. Malone, the women who took Louis with her to do some tests. The former beta was now again with them, staring out of the window. You would imagine he felt everything more intense or was overly anxious but that was not the case. He sat there, calm, silent and emotionless. What should he feel? The only thing he was afraid of was the reaction of his dad and Dr. Morrison. His dad would be furious if everything came to light, that he was the one who dragged Louis to the scientists and was getting money from Louis. And he had to email his doctor to warn him. It wasn’t his fault Louis told his pack everything. He should carry on with his studies to help people. He deserves his breakthrough with the suppressants or the lube. So that’s what Louis did. He wrote a short message to Dr. Morrison, being careful because he didn’t want the others to know what he did. They wouldn’t approve of it and he would make them angry and sad. Once again. They didn’t need that today. Eventually the others would find out about everything, the omega was sure he will tell them. At the right time. 

“Louis Tomlinson? Your results are available. Please follow me to our conference room so we have a calm space. If you wish your pack can come with you. It is totally your choice. We would like to have a psychologist with us in the room if you need support or want someone to talk to. But this is in your hands too. Whatever makes you comfortable.” In front of the five boys stood a petite woman with short brown hair and green eyes, a warm smile on her face and he voice held as much gentleness as possible in it. 

Louis looked at his friends and decided after a few seconds it was best they would come with him; he would have needed to repeat everything for them if they didn’t hear it themselves. The omega also agreed to a psychologist. Why not? Some analyzing and support wouldn’t hurt. Of course, his pack was with him and he trusts them but did they were truly interested in him? He lied to them all the years. They would dump him as fast as they could when he was physically fine.

Dr. Malone closed the door behind the boys and Mrs. Hughes, the psychologist. She was an elder woman with black hair and light, blue eyes. She seemed nice and shook everyone’s hand as an introduction. 

“I would like to begin with the most important organs such as heart, liver and kidney. You are not in immediate danger but it is still quite alarming. Your heart showed some disfunction. It is a little bit heart to pump the blood trough the arteries because they are constricted. With sport like jogging and soccer and a healthy diet it will be better in a few months and you don’t have to worry about a heart attack. Your liver might have to be taken out because it couldn’t detox all the toxins of the pills you took over the years. We would like you to talk to your mother or father if they would be willing to give you a piece of their own. We would have to test them beforehand if you two are compatible and speak to them about the risks and the aftermath of the surgery. As for your part I can tell you that it is very exhausting and you can’t perform or leave the hospital for a few weeks after operation. You as a band might have to cancel a lot of shows. One of you kidney is also damaged and we have to take this organ out too. You can still live with one so don’t worry about that. I know this was a lot of information so if you have any questions you are welcomed to ask me.” Dr. Malone looked at Louis and the others. 

“Could you hand us the diet plan or is it just a list of things Louis cannot eat anymore?” Harry was a healthy freak and obviously very interested in the new eating habits Louis had to dig into. 

“Mrs. Hughes and I decided it would be best to set a list of things Louis should not eat. It is best if you don’t feel suffocated by your new customs so be free to enjoy it as much as possible. You should not eat too much greasy food and don’t drink alcohol for the next half a years or so. Your body is in the progress of recovery and you should help him as much as you could. I will hand you the list after we finished here.” 

“What about my heats? I usually get them one or two days I stopped taking my suppressants. I don’t have an alpha and I think I won’t be allowed to spend them at the laboratory, am I?” Louis looked down as he finished. He didn’t want other alphas touching him but enduring a heat alone was just as bad. 

This was the first time Mrs. Hughes took a part in this conversation. 

“We don’t want to rush you. You don’t have an alpha and if you don’t want one it is okay. But you need to accept the help that is offered. Ask family or friends if you want to talk to them or need their help. I will give you my phone number and you can call me too if you need me and you are too shy to tell what happened to you to someone else. Call me day or night; I will be there for you.” Her expression was serious but still gentle. 

Dr. Malone took over from there. “Your heat will probably hit tomorrow and you can come here if you want. We have separated rooms for single omegas in their heats. Someone will take good care of you. But of course, you don’t have to. You can drive home or take a hotel room. Whatever you like best. As you said yourself, we can’t let you go to the laboratory. We will arrange meetings during the tour with Mrs. Hughes so she can help you with the damage that was done to your psyche.” 

“Were other organs damaged?” Liam looked worried from the doctor to Louis. 

“There is some small damaged but nothing that concerns us too much. Louis should be fine after a few weeks or months without the suppressants.” 

The boys had no more questions after that and got the diet list and the phone numbers of Dr. Malone and Mrs. Hughes. 

****

Back at the tour bus the boys sat down in the back of the bus where the couches were. 

“So … happy anniversary, eh?” Louis didn’t exactly wanted to break the ice but didn’t want to sit in silence the whole time with some wax figures as his friend because they didn’t talk or move. 

A humorless laugh was heard from Zayn. “I am still happy we are a band and together but this day didn’t exactly go as I planned it weeks ago. I thought about taking you all to a nice restaurant and watching some old video diaries of us as a cute reminder. I wanted to talk about our first performances, the solo ones and those as a group. About all the feelings we had and why we decided to take part in the competition. But then everything got down with the kidnapping and the hospital. Don’t get me wrong, lads! I am really happy we found out. I want to be there for you and help you Lou, none of this is your fault! I just wished it would be more peaceful and I not had to think about some surgery my friend maybe will have.” 

“I am sorry. You don’t have to do this. I don’t want to pressure you or be a burden. Because I am. I know I am. And I wish I hadn’t destroyed our fifth anniversary.” Tears welled up in Louis eyes and he had to blink them away. He didn’t want to make this day any worse by breaking out in sobs and needing comfort. 

“Stop it, boo! You know it is not your fault! You are not a burden and we will always be there for you. We are a pack. We love you. Never forget that.” Harry got on his knees in front of the omega and held his head in his big hands, looking deep in Louis eyes that teared up again at the words. The alpha wiped them away and leaned slowly forward, resting his forehead against Louis’, closing his eyes. 

“We can still talk to each other about everything, Zee. Why not light up our moods by talking about the good old past? Seeing you guys for the first time for example.” Niall looked at every member of his pack. “I remember those luscious locks of Hazza. I fell in love with them the moment I saw them. And those sweet, soft lips of Zayn. Very kissable if you ask me.” The omega got a tiny kiss from the alpha with those kissable lips next to him, just as expected. “The sweet smile Louis gave me as he saw me and the beautiful brown eyes of Liam.” 

Everyone was listening to their little sunshine and came up with their own memories. They talked to each other for hours now as Liam remembered something. 

“Lou? You were fifteen when you presented, right?” After a nod from Louis he told them what confused him. “So you took your suppressants and your dad took you to the laboratory. Why did he allow you to go to the competition? I mean you were secretly an omega. Wasn’t he afraid someone caught you or you would tell someone your secret?” 

Louis stiffened in his seat as he remembered the day of the competition before he was already there. “No, he didn’t allow me to go there. I ... eh … kind of ran off. He didn’t know I was going so I jumped out of my window and took the car of one of my friends. I knew he couldn’t do much when I got through and back home. And when I didn’t get through that would be fine too. So I made my decision and I won. When I came back that evening he asked me where I was and I told him. He wasn’t very happy about that … anyways, after my punishment he decided it would be good if I carry on with X factor because there was a tiny possibility I would win. He didn’t really believe in that, in me but that was fine with me. As we achieved third place and signed with our record label my dad began to take money from me. He saw the good for him in it so he didn’t stop me.” 

“We will have to talk to your dad tomorrow.” Liam was not pleased what he just heard out of the omegas mouth. They will find out what “Punishments” Louis talked about another time.


	13. Chapter 13

Warm sweat was covering Louis skin. He woke up when he felt his body preparing for the upcoming days of his heat. The other boys on the bus could smell the sweet, teasingly odor that tried to seduce them. 

“I’m going to the hospital. I don’t know when the first wave will hit and I don’t want anyone really around. I hope that okay with you, guys.” Louis stood before them, feeling very uncomfortable talking with his best lads about something so sexual. His clammy hands were wandering down the sweats he was wearing, getting rid of the stickiness. 

“Sure, you want one of us to drive you to Dr. Malone or should we ask Paul? I am not relaxed thinking about you getting in a cab while being in heat. There has to be someone to take care of you.” Harry’s brows were furrowed as he was thinking of the best way to get Louis safely to the heat room. 

Something snapped inside Louis. He wasn’t a baby and he told himself so many times other people decided what he should do. He was in heat but he could get there himself. It wasn’t very far and it only started a few hours ago. “I will go there perfectly fine by myself, mister. I am not disabled or a granddad that needs all the help he can get.” 

“You will not go alone, Louis. Don’t be a fool. You know that some alphas out there won’t be thinking twice when smelling you. Time has changed but not everyone is as nice as you think. I will get you to the hospital and you will come with me! This is no joke. We are worrying about you and want you to be safe so don’t be a dickhead.” Liam’s voice got louder as he carried on. The omega was near to crying because it hurt what the alpha said to him. Furthermore, the anger boiled in Louis and he had to control himself not to scream back. Why was Liam so mean to him? The omega did let it slip a few times prior when the head alpha said something because he didn’t care that much. This was once again a breaking point. Unfortunately, he had no time and strength for arguing now. 

“Alright! I’ll call Paul so you don’t have to stand the dickhead anymore. We will see each other in a few days. See you.” With that Louis was rushing out of their tour bus, his phone in hand. He would have travelled alone but Liam sure will find out and he didn’t want the next fight with him. They would talk later about the issue of determination. 

**** 

The days flew by; the pack did their shows without Louis and told the fans a made up story about him being ill. Zayn talked to management about Louis and the whole omega topic and when the best time for a coming out is. They were discussing when they should speak to Louis parents and his family, especially his father. They all agreed his dad needed a trial and a serious punishment for what he has done to Louis for the past seven years. His inhumanity was shocking and they needed to do something against it. The younger sisters of Louis haven’t presented yet and the boys didn’t want them to experience the same thing as their brother did. 

The small fight that Louis and Liam pulled off before the omega left got them thinking about the power that they may or may not have. He was an omega. But not their omega. He needed support and not some dumb friends that thought they knew everything better. 

**** 

“Lou!!!” The jumpy omega screeched and pulled his best friend into a firm hug. “I’ve missed you! How was your heat?” the wide grin of Niall made Louis smile himself and he could get out a small “Good”. Niall was an omega too, so he sure did knew what it was like to lay alone in a bed, covered in sweat and cum and with a toy stuck up your arse. Nothing to be ashamed of, right? 

“Niall, calm down, sweets, we don’t want to frighten him right?” A small chuckle from Zayn was heard as he peeled his omega from the other one. 

“You don’t have to tell us what happened, Louis. I am sure it is not easy on you and we don’t want you to feel uncomfortable.” An empathic smile was seen on the alphas face and Louis was glad he understood. Being in heat was nothing he wanted the others to know about. 

“We want to talk to you, if that’s okay. We weren’t the greatest friend in the last week and want to apologize.” The blonde omega looked from his alpha back to his friend with sadness in his voice. 

“There are no apologies needed, Niall. I wasn’t the best omega and I get it. Liam was right about me being a dickhead and I will follow you orders.” He slightly bowed his head, hoping it would make the others happy. Before his heat he felt anger but after four days without the lad he missed them. Disturbing the peace right after he came back isn’t the best move to get along with them. The omega just needed to find his place. And that was below the alphas. 

“What? No!! This is not your fault. Please hear us out.” Before Louis could say another thing Niall dragged him down the small hallway to the couches where Liam and Harry were sitting next to each other on the left side, waiting for them. 

“Hey” Liam’s voice was soft and everyone could see the remorse in his eyes. Louis held his breath. Did he do something wrong? He sat down on the opposite couch the two alphas, in the middle of Niall and Zayn. 

“I want to apologize. I am really sorry for every demanding comment I have made. It is not my right to tell you what to do and I realized that in the past days. I really hope you can forgive me and I understand if you need time to think about everything.” The head alpha looked between Louis and the carpet. 

The omega couldn’t believe what he just heard. “I was angry with you and you were a dick but of course I forgive you. I couldn’t hold a grudge against you for longer than a few days anyway. You have helped me over the last week and were there for me. You made bad decisions but that’s just human. But still, I don’t want any more comments about what I need to do. I want to figure it out myself and not let people dictate my live.” 

“Yeah, we understand that know, Lou. We will sure get better as time goes on. This situation is hard on us, too. Only together we will pull through it.” Harry gave them all an encouraging smile.

“There is the question about coming out … we want to know what you think about it.” Zayn remembered the conversation with management. They were talking about strategy, coming out when the net album is out to promote it. But they didn’t know if that would be the best idea and to prove their newly made decision to let Louis create his own path they were asking him. 

“I don’t know. Not for the next few days, I need to let this all sink in myself first and then I will tell the world.” 

“What about your parents?” Niall put a reassuring and supporting hand on Louis arm. 

“Oh, yeah. My mom doesn’t even know what dad did to me. I will sleep about that too, okay?” 

“You don’t need to ask us for permission Louis. We have learned our lesson and we have no right to get in between it” Harry said. 

“And that brings us to the next point. This might be sudden but we have talked about it a lot and came to an agreement. Do you want to be a member of our pack? Do you want to be our boyfriend?” Shock was written on Louis face after he heard Liam’s words.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Talking about forming a pack :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey,   
> I am really sorry it took me so much longer!!! I am in a lot of stress lately and therefore can't promise you regular updates. I will try my best to uptade every tuesday but next month will be all of my exams. Other than that, I wish you a lovely reading!   
> Your SoSecret

“Wha … what?” Louis was shocked by what he heard. Did they really want to put him – the liar, disgrace, defective omega – into their totally perfect, loving pack? Who would be so stupid? He would ruin everything, just like he has ruined his own life. His body needs surgery and his mental health isn’t in a good state either. He doesn’t want to call the therapist. She might be really good but then he would admit that he is ill and bad and weak. What happened to the funny, carefree, optimistic and strong beta everyone knew a few weeks ago? Was it a total façade or the lad Louis wanted to be? Who was he? The omega didn’t need anyone to tell him what he has done to others and himself. He felt confused most of the time and didn’t know how to act. So he didn’t do anything at all. He put the Louis he knew into a bottle and tightened the lid so the old one wouldn’t come free again. Now, he needed to figure out who the new Louis was. The omega one. Maybe he could be sweet and submissive. Was that what the others wanted him to be? It was optional that they wanted him closer to them so they could have an eye on him and wouldn’t do something bad anymore. Niall wasn’t submissive and told everyone what he thought and was free in most cases. What were they expecting from him? Yes or no? 

“You don’t have to answer us right away if you are unsure but feel free to talk about your concerns if you have any. We want to be there for you, help you, take care of you and we would have done that years ago but you were … kind of … a beta.” Zayn said to the omega. “We didn’t want to risk anything so we went with our mind and not heart. In all of our hearts you are a part of this family and we want this to be official. We want you to feel part of this family in more than one way.” 

“But … why? Why would you want me? Me of all you could have? I did horrible things and I can’t forgive myself for what I have done. So why would you forgive me?” Louis felt the storm of feelings inside of him rise. 

“Because we love you, Lou. If you could see you through our eyes you would see a beautiful, caring, funny, passionate and wonderful person. You had you reasons and we understand what you did. You were afraid and thought it was for the best. We want to show you these people are horrible and not you. You were their tool. Nothing bad is in you Louis. Those people are bad and not you!” Niall looked deep into his companions eyes, hoping his message would get through. 

“But I am not this person. I don’t know who I am. I was this beta but now … I was always this beta. I cannot be a submissive and cute omega, I think.” The former omega looked down, feeling tears welling up in his eyes. 

“First of all,” Liam began “you don’t have to be anything you don’t want to be. It is fine if you feel uncomfortable being submissive and cute, although I personally think you are cute. There is no need to act a certain way, we will love you either way. Submissiveness is overrated. And second of all we will find out who you are if you don’t know it now. We’re are together in this and if you like how you acted when you were a beta then change nothing about it. Let your body and mind be led by instinct and not by the norm of society.” 

“So … you would be fine with me if I wouldn’t oblige any comment of yours?” Louis still felt uncertain about him being a part of the pack. What if he did anything wrong? 

“We are no dictators, Louis” Harry laughed and winked at the omega. With a more serious note he continued “Talk to us when you feel unsure and pressured. As a pack we are doing this as a team and not we are saying what you have to do. You have as much input in this relationship as we have.” 

“A relationship between lovers consists of more than talking and daily routine. What … what about … you know …” Louis cheeks reddened because of his thoughts. 

“About ….? What do you want to tell us, little one?” Zayn had a suspicion but seeing Louis with a pretty cherry face was enough to make him ask. How could anyone not see his cuteness? 

“Like … kisses … and more. Oh, Zayn! Don’t act like you don’t know what I mean!” The cherry face was hiding behind two small hands, trying to cover up the embarrassment. The laughter of all the lads was heard and two strong arms wrapped themselves around Louis’ frame, coating Louis nose with the wonderful smell of Zayn – wood, coffee and cigarettes. It might be a strange combination but it perfectly fit the alpha. After tensing up and quickly recovering from the sudden closeness of the alpha, Louis’ hands were lifted from his face and he looked right into the dark brown eyes of Zayn. His breath got caught in his throat because of the beautiful sight. There were not many occasions he got his beloved alpha this close to him and he wasn’t it expecting it either. For a split second he thought Zayn would kiss him right there and then but a moment after his hands were set down on his thighs while the alpha broke the eye contact. To say Louis was a little bit disappointed was an understatement but he was glad too because the other three were still in the room, observing every movement he made. 

“To come back to your question” an awkward laugh left Liam’s mouth “we would go in a slow pace, not rushing things or force something. And if you don’t feel safe with anything you don’t have to kiss us or anything. But on the other side we don’t want you to feel left out. We might talk about that topic in the future if needed.” 

“But to be a part of this pack you have to bond with me and therefore have sex with me.” The omega reasoned. 

“Technically, yeah.” Harry took over “bonding without having sex would lead to a temporary bond which would have to be renewed every now and then. And that might lead to annoyance and difficulties. Another point is that we don’t know how you react to having sex with an alpha because you were raped in the past.” 

Louis didn’t want to talk about raping, not wanting to remember anything those alphas did to him. “But you wouldn’t rape me. I can trust you.” The others smiled at his words. They were progressing. 

“We would immediately stop if you would want us to stop.” Liam said. “What leads us to our next topic. What do you think about a safe word Louis? We don’t want to practice BDSM with you but it would give us a look into your feelings.” 

“I am not this familiar with BDSM as you are Liam so feel free to enlighten me.” A cheesy smile was plastered onto Louis’ face. “Do you mean I say for example banana if I feel distressed and want you to stop with whatever you are doing?” Harry’s eyes crinkled at Louis’ illustration of the banana. 

“Not quite” Niall had to hold his belly from all the laughing “He means the traffic lights. Green, yellow and red. We ask you for a color and you answer with one of those as a representation of your feelings and comfortableness. For example if everything is nice and nothing concerns you you’d say green. If you want a little pause and need to rethink or breathe a little you’d say yellow. And if you want us to immediately stop you’d say red. We don’t have to ask you every time for a color, when you feel you need to say your color you are to say it.” 

“Ah, got it. Thanks, Nialler. Yeah, I like that; I think it could be helpful.” Louis answered after some time of thinking. 

“Then would that be settled.” Liam smiled at everyone. “So … do you have an answer for us? If not think more about it we don’t want to stress you.” 

“No, I don't need any more time. I will go with my heart and say yes” Louis was a little shy and looked though his dark lashes up at the lads who were grinning at his answer. In the next moment he was covered by four bodies, feeling the warmth and comfort they were giving him. He felt secure for the first time in a long time. They will help him in every aspect. Finding his identity, health and love. 

“Green.”


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi,   
> Unfortunately, there will be no update next week because I am in too much stress.   
> Enjoy this one! We'll speak us in two weeks again. I wish you all a good week xx  
> Your SoSecret

“Hey, mom. How are you?” Louis sat in the lobby of their new hotel, watching people checking in and out. Mostly business people, who didn’t spare one glance at the omega on the phone talking lowly to someone. 

“Louis! Nice to hear your voice again! We haven’t talked for ages. I am good love, thanks. How are you? Is everything going good? How’s the tour?” Her son let out a little chuckle at the seemingly never ending storm of words leaving his mother’s mouth. 

“Yeah, I’m fine, thank you. The tour’s going okay. Are you home for the next few days?” 

“That’s good. I am currently in London but will be back in two days, why are you asking?” Her tone changed from casual to concern. It wasn’t usual for Louis to visit his family during their tight schedule. 

“I would like to speak to you in person, mom. If that’s okay we will come to London and have a chat, alright?” Louis saw Liam coming over to him from the elevators. 

“Why Louis? What’s so important you can’t tell me on the phone? Baby, is really everything alright? Or do I have to be worried?”

“Mom. I will tell you everything when we meet, yeah? I call you back later but please promise me you will meet me.” His … still a strange to call Liam that … Alpha was now sitting next to him on the couch, frowning a little. 

“Of course, sweetie. I will always meet you if I can. Love you; call me back when you can.” His mother ended the call after Louis told her his goodbye. 

“Color?” Liam rubbed the omegas back. 

“Green.” Louis looked up with a little smile. “I need to tell her already what has happened. I shouldn’t postpone it any further. Did you speak to management?” 

“Yeah, we just finished a few minutes ago. Everything is settled. They are not happy about our decision but that’s their problem. You are far more important than any concert or tour in the world.” 

“Mhm. I still feel sorry. I mean it is my fault that our fans won’t see us and we have to delay the tour to next year.” 

“Hey, no need to feel sorry, little one. You need time to heal properly and if the tour is stressing you too much we shouldn’t tour. It was a group decision, remember?” Liam nudged him a bit with his elbow. 

“Of course I remember” Louis laughed and shoved Liam’s arm lovingly away “And if you remember I was the only one against it.” 

“You’re right. And I am right when I tell you your self-evaluation needs some help. Come on. I think we have to book a flight and make an announcement that the tour is cancelled.” The alpha got up from the couch and held a hand out for the omega to take. 

“My self-evaluation is good enough to tell me I will get up from this couch all by my own so thank you a lot mister.” Louis went by Liam with a forward jutted chin. 

**** 

“Come on, Lou, the planes landing soon and your mother is waiting for us at our house” Harry shook Louis shoulders. 

Their drive from the airport to their home in London was smooth. The omega prepared his words for his mother but was too worried about her direction. There was a chance she would reject him, wouldn’t trust him anymore. What about his sisters? Would he ever see them again? 

As long as their journey took it wasn’t long enough. 

“Alright … Let’s see what happens right, guys?” He threw an enthusiastic smile at his bandmates as their parked in their garage. 

“Lou,” Niall grabbed Louis arm “take your time. No one’s pressuring you. If you want to think about your decision it’s okay.” 

“Thank you, Ni, but there is no way out of this and the talk will happen sooner or later. Just … you will be there for me right?” 

“What question is that? Of course we will be there for you Lou! Right by your side where we belong.” The omegas put their foreheads at each other’s. 

“Okay, I am ready, thank you Niall.” Louis looked at their white painted house. He was just a few weeks prior in there, as a beta. He stepped over the threshold as his real self, the one he should have been all the years. It smelled like home, warmth spread through his body. The boys did their usual “Home-coming” routine, getting their shoes off, throwing the car keys into the little bowl next to their telephone, hanging their jackets on the holder. 

Next, they would have stepped into their kitchen or living room but Louis’ mom appeared in the doorframe and clasped her son in her arms as if he ran away if she didn’t hold him as strong as she could. 

“I missed you baby” She mumbled into Louis’ hair and rubbed his back and head. 

“Missed you too, mom, but I will choke if you don’t let go of me” Louis did three claps on his mother’s back as a sign of giving up. 

“Yeah, right, we don’t want that.” After greeting the other boys and making tea for everyone they sat in the living room on their couches and talked about uninteresting events as Louis mother came to the reason Louis wanted to meet her. This is the moment, Louis thought. 

“Mom, what I will tell you in a minute will be a shock for you and I want tell you beforehand that I love you and I am sorry. I didn’t want to crash your world and you were so happy when I told you what I was. But please mom, if you have it in you and if you love me as much as I love you, please forgive me. You don’t have to right away but, please, do it.” 

Louis looked pleadingly at his mother. 

“Lou, what is that all about? Don’t be so cryptic and obviously I love you. There is nothing I can think of that I wouldn’t forgive you.” Jo, took her sons hands into her own. 

“you don’t know what I will confess to you. This is really hard for me.” He looked at his pack for reassurance. They all smiled at him and nodded. He was doing the right thing. 

“Mom, I am not a beta. I presented as an omega.” 

“What? Louis? You are a beta, why would you lie to me all these years? I don’t understand” She looked confused from Louis to his bandmates. 

“That’s the point mom. I didn’t tell you because dad wouldn’t let me. He said I was a shame for the family and you wouldn’t love me anymore and then I got on suppressants. 

When I told you I was a beta you were so happy!” His voice started to crack and tears ran down his face. “How could I tell you I was an omega and risk you really would start to hate me, just like he did? You were proud of me and our relationship just got better from there on.” His mother embraced him into a hug the second time this day. She was starting to cry too. 

“Oh my god, Louis, baby, I could never ever hate you! You will be my little baby boy forever and nothing can change that. I love you being a beta and an omega! Never think different of me.” She brought a little distance between them and took Louis’ head in her hands, looking deep into his eyes. “I love you. Nothing can change that. Do you understand? And I forgive you for not telling me. But I would have been happy with you being an omega too. I will always be proud of you. But there are still thinks you need to elaborate on. What did you say about your dad? He knew about this the whole time? And what about you guys? You should know suppressants are dangerous.”

So Louis took her questions as an invitation to tell her everything about his past what he has told his pack too. The suppressants and their side effects, the laboratory, the kidnapping and the most recent events: coming off of suppressants, cancelling the tour and becoming a pack and the future: getting to the hospital and get the surgery done. He was asking his mother if she could spend him half of her liver and she agreed immediately. They were sitting there the whole evening, talking about the past, present and future. It was relieving, Louis had to say, telling his mom about everything. The next step was telling the world. But that would have to wait. At that moment he wanted to remember this moment of creating a new bond with his mother by telling her the truth.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am back! yay! Thank you for your understanding!   
> Have fun reading this chapter. Personally, I think this one might be my favorite :)   
> Your SoSecret

„Via Twitter?“ Niall sat on the couch and looked at the rest of his pack. Louis mother left yesterday and the boys were now talking about how they should proceed. What has to come next? Louis decided it would be the right time to tell their fans what is going on in their lives. But how? 

“No, that is too impersonal for my kind of taste. It is great for small videos or some longer texts but I think they deserve more. They have with us through thick and thin. A small “Hey, I’m an omega. Sorry I lied to you. We will be back in a year or so.” doesn’t seem right to me.” Louis frowned as he explained. “But there has to be better way. There just has to be one!”

“All right little one, don’t your brain about this topic. You know we don’t have to rush these things. We are on a break now and they can wait a little.” Liam put a hand on the omegas head, which was slapped right away. 

“You may feel as if you have all time in the universe but … I don’t! I feel like every second is running through my hands and I am lazily sitting here while I should be out there.” 

Louis’ voice got agitated and bad feelings welled up again. He had some smaller breakouts throughout the past days and they still weren’t sure how they should cope with that. It was all too unfamiliar. 

“Boo Bear.” Harry’s voice was low and sad. 

Louis looked up with a shocked face. “You haven’t called me that in ages.” 

“No. I haven’t. But I think now is the right time to remind you of your nickname. We were getting older and drifted away from each other. Granted, we still got along really well and I wanted to call you boo bear all the time but … it showed so much affection. You know that don’t you? I used to tease you with it and you hated it but deep down” Harry tipped with the tip of his index finger on the left side of Louis’ chest, right above the heart “You loved it. And you still love it. I know it. So boo bear, I have to tell you where you should be. You should be here. Right in this moment you are to be with us, with your pack. And we have to be with our boo bear. Because we love you. You have time boo. And I you ever feel time slipping through your hands just hold mine or Zayn’s, Liam’s or Niall’s. We will keep the time in your hand okay, boo bear?” 

Tears were shimmering in the omegas eyes and he only brought out a small mumbled “Mhm”. Harry was right. He was their boo bear and they will be there for him. 

“Alright, color?” Zayn asked. 

“Green” Louis smiled. “We can go on. Thank you Hazza.” When the others will call him boo bear again why not give in his own wishes and call his beloved lanky boy Hazza again? He missed the familiar sound of it coming out of his mouth and grinned at the others. 

“So no twitter, Instagram or an interview. What’s left?” Zayn let out a little chuckle. 

The stress was coming back and created silence between them. 

“Got it!” Louis screeched. “That’s the best idea! We make a video diary!!” 

“Bringing back the old days, tommo?” Liam laughed. “If you wish so we will set up the camera. Stairs or couch?” He finished with a cheeky smile. 

“Couch! It’s softer. Alright. We now only need a few questions. Zayn, Niall could you be so nice and pick out a few twitter questions that occurred over the past days? Thanks! Liam and harry, you set up the camera. And I will make some tea! Any preferences?” Louis ordered the others around while walking to the kitchen. He needed to be alone and do something while thinking. What should they tell them? How should he phrase this? Of course he couldn’t be extremely funny since they are talking about a serious topic. Maybe this wasn’t a good idea after all. Just as he wanted to retract he felt two big hands on his shoulders, keeping him grounded. 

“Everything will be fine, little one.” Liam spoke softly into his ear. 

“How did you know I doubted my choice?” Louis spoke just as quietly as his alpha. 

“I am you alpha, Lou. I know you better than you think. What made you think it wouldn’t be as good as you first thought?” Liam questioned and turned the smaller man aground so he could see him in his eyes. 

“Well, the video diaries are funny. And this one won’t be funny. Won’t this fact change the view on them?” Louis looked worried up to Liam. 

“Not everything has to be funny Louis. And you can still throw in jokes. No one wants to stop you from being your goofy self. Don’t stress yourself, it will be fine.” 

“Yeah you’re right. Thank you. Then let’s get this thing started.” They both grabbed their mugs and walked back in the living room. 

****

“How do you feel?” Niall asked Louis after they finished the video. 

“Relieved. And you? I don’t want to steel the limelight, you know?” They sat alone in the living room with a second cup of tea in their hands. 

“There is nothing to steel, Lou. And if there was I would gladly give it to you. You deserve the love you get. We omegas need affection, love and caretakers. I don’t want to admit it myself but omegas are quite fragile. I have a lot of respect for you. You have gone through a lot alone, without anyone helping you and saying you are good.” 

“Sometimes I doubt if I am good. I still believe that the studies were in some way good. Of course I now see they weren’t good for me but surely someone had a profit from it, right?” Louis answered. 

“Boo, I think the only people who had a profit from these experiments were the scientists. Do you want to tell us what they did to you some day? Maybe it would help? Talking to someone is always the best. I don’t want to pressure you, but you know we are here for you, yeah?” Niall drank the last sip of his tea and put it down on the small table besides him. 

“I know, Niall. I know.” Louis sighted. “It is still kind of fresh if you get what I mean. Has the police found them by now?” 

“No” Niall looked out of the window “They are still somewhere out there. But we will find them!” 

“Of course we will, sweetheart.” Louis smiled at his mate. “How is it to have a real bond to alphas?” 

Niall laughed, “It is really good” He crooked his head to one side and gave Louis a lopsided grin. “Why do you ask? Getting impatient?” 

“No” Louis coughed uncomfortably “just curious. Do you feel differently?” 

“Yeah, it is like I am never alone. I know they are a small part of me and feel emotions from me if they are strong enough. It is warm, cozy. You will get what I mean when they will bond with you.” Niall had this specific look on his face that indicated he was thinking about his pack. The utter face of love. 

After a small part of silence Louis came back to the video diary. “Do you think they will accept me? I mean the fans.” 

“Yeah they will, Lou. You explained everything really good and I think they won’t care you lied to them. You’ll see.” Niall shuffled over to Louis on the couch and put his head on Louis shoulder. “They will love you just the same, like we do. Not everything changes, you know? I always hoped you would become one with this pack and now you are. I call this destiny. Everything will fall on their right place.” 

“You always wanted me? Then, now you got me. I wanted all of you too. But you know these issues with betas. Nevertheless, I love you Niall.” 

“I love you too.” 

**** 

“The video got viral, wow! I would have never thought it would go this quick.” They were sitting on the dining table, eating dinner and checking their YouTube channel. 

“Lou, you have to see this. Read through the comments.” Zayn gave Louis his phone. 

They were all watching him as he read the comments under their video diary. The fans wished Louis everything good and many felt like crying. They were all worried for him; shock and happiness were the most common feelings. Nevertheless, the comments were all goodhearted and warmed Louis heart. He would have never thought the response would be this positive, he felt loved and cared for. The omega began crying and pressed Zayn’s pone near his chest as he shrank in on himself, sobs wreaking his small body. But these were good teas, teas of happiness and relief. Liam lifted Louis out of his seat and put him on his lap, kissing his hair and stroking his back. 

“I told you they will love and accept you, Lou.” Niall whispered into Lou’s ear and kissed his temple while smiling at his other alphas.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tomorrow will be a chapter too because I didnt get to update last tuesday.   
> Have a good day and much fun while reading this! xxx   
> Your SoSecret

Louis woke up in his own separate bedroom while the sun shined on the bedsheets in front of his eyes. He stretched and yawned like a little kitten and stared up on the ceiling, his hands folded over his belly. “What are the others doing right now?” he questioned himself. As he thought about it, he hadn’t had quite some time alone lately. Not that he was bothered by it was strange. A month ago it was him and them, no we in the equation. But a month ago a lot of things were different. Louis allowed himself to let his thoughts wander to his father. What was he doing? He was missing since Louis outed himself in front of his pack and the police was still searching for him. When he is found there will be a trial. Louis isn’t sure what he would get for the many crimes he did, especially what he did to his omega son. Would it be Louis fault if his father received a life sentence? How should he explain that to his little sisters that he is the cause they only can see their father when they visit him in jail? 

There is no reason thinking about it at the moment. He should live in the present time and don’t think about the future or past. Speaking of present time, he came to the current situation of the date for his surgeries getting closer. He never had a surgery and was pretty nervous how it would be. Granted, he gets sedated and won’t acknowledge doctors lance his skin. But what is more nerve wrecking is the pain he will have afterwards. In his opinion he had enough pain for a very long time. Why did he get this hard life? Had he the chance to change everything if he spoke out about this topic previously? No one knows the answer to that. So why bother with questions like that? Why does it affect Louis this much if he thinks about those kind of questions, those who he never will have an answer to and he can’t change what happened. It is pointless. But letting go is hard. It is so, so hard especially because he doesn’t know how. He never accepted the help of the psychologist; what can a foreign person who knows you for almost five minutes tell you about yourself? He knows himself his whole life and can tell himself what he did wrong and how broken he is and was. 

The sun caressed his cheek at that moment. A little bright streak of warmth and light interrupted his trail of thoughts. He should get up and see if the others are awake too. Louis walked down the corridor and opened the door to the huge bedroom of his pack members a gap. They were huddled together in the middle of their gigantic bed, Niall in the middle, all arms over his body. What would Louis do to lie next to them. He was about to go back to his room to get ready for the day but Zayn’s whisper held him back from his plan. 

“Hey, Lou. What’s up, mate?” Zayn was lying on the nearest place to the door and blinked up to his band member. 

“Nothing, just checking if you’re awake. I’ll let you sleep, sorry for disturbing.” Louis closed the door a little more after a last smile to Zayn. 

“Wait, Louis. Do you … you know … want to cuddle with us? I know the others aren’t awake yet but they would enjoy their company just as much as I do.” Zayn offered. 

“Äh … I don’t know …” the omega looked down at his feet. He would love to jump in their huge bed and be cuddled, feel their warmth and smell them. He was pack. So why did he hesitate? Zayn isn’t joking. There are no real risks and it would be really fun. So he nodded at his alpha, stepped into the room and closed the door behind him. 

Zayn opened his one arm and scooted to the side so Louis could lie besides him and Harry. It was hot under the duvet and with all the body heat but Louis didn’t want to miss any more nights of this. Maybe he could talk to Liam and ask him if it would be okay if he slept with them in one bed from now on. 

Louis felt a nose running up and down his neck. “Mhhmm. You smell good” Zayn mumbled nears his ear, his lips slightly touching the omegas skin. Shivers were running down Louis spine and he could only get out a breathy “Thanks” whilst holding himself back from purring. 

A hand was combing through his hair, turning his head to Zayn’s side, meeting the thick smell of coffee as his nose was pressed against Zayn’s shoulder. “Let go sweetheart. Those are your instincts and I am your alpha, no need to hold anything back.” The alphas voice was slightly husky and primal instincts washed over Louis. His hands were grabbing Zayn’s black hair, tugging and combing through them, his nose still smelling him as if Zayn was fresh air after Louis drowned, lips parted and tongue running over the veins, feeling the fast thumping heartbeats. Their bodies were pressing against each other, the air rich with their pheromones but never going further than what they are doing at that moment. They still hadn’t kissed; no one of the pack has kissed Louis. It should be a special moment, not that this wasn’t special. This moment was needed, Louis needed an alpha he could smell and feel. 

This was going on for minutes and stopped as Louis realized what he was doing. He immediately sat up and apologized to Zayn, and woke the others up. 

“Pshht, hey, hey, Louis.” Zayn sat up too and took Louis face into his hands. “No need feel sorry. I really enjoyed it and you did too, didn’t you?” 

“Yeah, but … we shouldn’t have done that. Not right now and next to the sleeping figures of the others” Louis spared Harry, Niall and Liam a short glance. 

“What are we Louis?” Zany asked gently. 

“What do you mean? Humans? Friends?” The omega was confused; he didn’t expect a question like that. 

“Close, but no. We are a pack. This is normal Lou. We wake up next to each other, grooming, cuddling, scenting each other, having sex, screaming at the others. There is no wrong waking up next to each other. You did nothing wrong and the others agree with me, right guys?” Zayn looked expectantly at the others, waiting for an answer. 

“I don’t know what was going on while we were sleeping, but Zee is right Lou. We won’t pressure you to accept that fact but you will eventually get used to it, I am sure of that.” Liam gave him a reassuring smile. 

“Speaking of not knowing what was going on: What did you two do?” Niall smirked at them and Louis blushed so much that Zayn was engulfing him in a hug, Louis face effectively hiding. 

“He was scenting and licking me” The asked alpha answered with a proud grin, petting Louis’ hair. 

“Lucky” Harry chuckled and let himself fall back in the covers, taking Niall down with him. 

Zayn was doing the same with Louis. The couples were facing each other, Liam watching over them. 

****

Later that they, the pack was sitting in the living room sipping through the channels. 

“Will you guys wait for me while the surgery gets done?” Louis sat next to Niall as he asked the others. 

“Of course we will, silly!” Harry exclaimed. “It is already in four days. I can’t believe how time runs. Your mom will come to our house a day before right?” 

“Yeah, I am really grateful she said yes to donate a part of her liver because it is risky for her. What about the time after the surgery?” 

“As long as I understand the doctor right you are supposed to stay for a few weeks at the hospital and then we will take you back home as long as you go frequently to the check-ups. Your kidney will be removed, your other one works fine.” Liam answered. 

“What if there are complications?” Louis fiddled with the cushion on his side. 

“You are the strongest person I know Lou. You will get through that and we will help you.” Zayn said. 

“Alright, thank you. I love you lads.” The others were smiling at him but Niall whispered “You still sound as if you are talking to a good friend and not your lovers. We need to change that”.

****

The day before Louis mom would come to them, Liam took Louis out to the city so the others could prepare a little surprise for their omega. 

They were arranging a nice dinner of different sorts of pizza, the last greasy meal Louis’ liver had to cope with for a while. Ice cream as dessert and if the atmosphere was right they would serve another dessert. Candles were lit in the living room, cushions and blankets were spread out on the floor so they would have it comfortable whilst sitting on the ground. They heard the key rustling on the front door and nodded at each other after a final look through the room. 

“We’re back!” Louis shouted. 

“Living room” Harry shouted back. 

Soft music was playing in the background as Louis stepped into the room. His eyes widened when he saw what his pack has done for him. The candles and low fire in the chimney threw mysterious shadows on the walls and let the eyes of the people in the room glisten. 

“You guys are nuts!” A laugh escaped Louis’ pink lips as he walked over to the three people standing next to their little nest of coziness. 

“Come on. Alphas, you get the pizzas and we test the cushions.” Niall shooed them out of their zone and sat down with Louis next to him. 

“You will love this evening!” The omega promised Louis. 

And he held his promise, it was a lovely evening. The food was the greatest he had for some time which was hard if you live with Harry Styles under one roof. They had a great laugh and joked around about every single topic they found. The boys were all getting up to blow out the candles and make themselves ready for bed. 

“Liam?” Louis asked “Can I sleep in your bed tonight?” 

“Of course little one. I will carry you alright? You will have enough stress in the next few weeks so let’s call it quits today and let you sleep baby. You look tired.” 

“I am.” The omega made grabby hands in his alphas direction who scooped him up into his arms. 

“So no second dessert I guess?” Zayn asked with a small pout as Liam and Louis walked by. 

“Next time, Zee. “ Liam gave him a light kiss on the mouth and got Louis to their room. 

“Hey, can you change clothes yourself or do you want me to do it?” Liam gently asked. 

“You. I don’t want to move a limb anymore. This evening was too cozy, my mind is all fluffy” Louis mumbled. It was cute if you asked Liam but he felt a little uncomfortable. It wasn’t the first time he saw Louis naked but this felt different. He was in charge. His omegas was too tired to do it himself so he trusted his alpha in that case. 

It wasn’t much of responsibility but he wanted to make his omega warm, pretty and happy. So he put him in one of his own t-shirts and a new pair of boxers. The others were joining the two in the bedroom. 

“Now only teeth’s brushing is left. Harry, please help me with this.” They got in the loo with their omega half asleep in Harry’s arms. “I need your help too, little on. Come on, open your mouth” 

After a little experiencing f different techniques they got the job done and went into bed. The omegas were in between their alphas, which couldn’t be any happier. Louis was snoozing and unconsciously turned himself so he could scent harry while he slept. 

“Was this evening too much for him or why is he so out of it?” Niall asked in concern. 

“No, sweetie, this evening was exactly what he needed. His omega needs the affection and he is so out of it because we lulled him into sleep with all the love we gave him.” Liam answered with a kiss on the cheek for their wide awake omega. 

“I understand. Thank you alpha. Let us sleep now, tomorrow will be an eventful day too I reckon. Sleep well. You especially Lou.” He kissed all of the pack members on the cheek and scooted closer to his omega.

**Author's Note:**

> If you have any concerns, thoughts or questions don't hesitate to comment them.  
> Thank you all so much for reading!  
> Your SoSecret


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